Hi Kaushik,
Well done there. Your essay deals with ideas, somewhat similar to the 6-scored essay in the powerprep software for this topic

.
However, your third para - 'However, technology introduces some other.....' is, I feel, not too connected with the rest of your passage. Remove it and you'll be well off. [^]
In my essay, I actually thought of considering loneliness at 3 levels-
International levels, Business front, individual aspects.
As for the timing, this was an actual Computer Adaptive Test in the Pprep software. So no compromises. I came up with my story in about 40 minutes. And since you've written that you have your GRE in another 2 days, its imperative that you practice the Powerprep tests (in case you havent) for the
AWA.
Good luck for the GRE and dont forget to put up your experiences here, soon after you finish your test

. I sure the rest of us would be eager to get feedback from you front-liners of the NEW GRE.