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Having second thoughts while playing the waiting game...


Water Lilly

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As I wait for a word about doctoral admissions, I am starting to have second thoughts about a Ph.D. I am currently a HS teacher and am looking to move away from my town to another area w/ better opportunities. (Ph.D is NOT an escape hatch..I'm just saying I have other options), The Ph.D is something I had thought about off and on for years but never felt the ultimate burning desire that I would "die" w/o it. I alreayd have a Masters. I think it would be great to get one, however I am wondeirng about the time committment. And mental health.

 

My Masters is in an area I don't really like teaching. I'm thinking that if I get a Masters in English it would qualify me to teach at the community college level and allow me to do tech writing like I want to. The Ph.D program I applied to has a Rhet/Comp & Professional writing focus (which would be nice) but I am wondering if I had followed this path as an undergrad and subsequently in grad school, would I want it now?

 

Is there another way to my goals? I am getting philosophical about this. Does anyone else feel like they are second guessing themselves? Is this normal?

 

Originally, I went in asking about the Masters to maybe boost me into teaching college level Composition full time and tech writing. However, the Dept. Chair looked at me and said "why don't you apply for the Ph.D instead? You already have a masters." When I told him it wasn't in English, his response was "so?". :hmm:

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A PhD is a huge commitment, and when you feel you're not really 100% convinced that this is what you want to do, it might be better not to do it at all. If you feel you want to teach at community colleges and work as a technical writer, there is no need to get a PhD at all! Of course, if you have time and funding and you just love studying, why not, afterwards, you can still teach at community college and work as a tech writer.

If it's only a matter of wanting to change the subject you're currently teaching, a master might be a better fit for you. You need to consider whether you have the money to support yourself in case (and if you're going for an English MA or MFA this is highly likely) you don't get any funding. In case your current field is not so far removed from English, you could try to change your field of focus by taking some writing work-shops or other composition courses, without going for an MA. If your Master was in history, Am Stud, Comp Lit, or anything similar, I'm sure it wouldn't be too difficult to become qualified to teach Eng Composition courses without doing an MA.

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Thanks Cridamour! I do have quite a bit of college level teaching experience in the Speech/Comm realm (not full time though). Some schools are picky about having 18 or more hours in the field of composition or even an entire masters (some take 18 hours w/ a related masters...me?) In fact, in addition to teaching HS, I am currently also teaching a 200 level college speech class. I really do like your idea of taking the writing workshops. I started taking some lit classes last year but only got in 7 grad hours w/o signing up for the Masters.

 

Uuuggghhh! The day I visited the college I got caught up in the atmosphere and the ivy and the coffee shops and the intellectualism...it was too much! I felt swept off my feet. I love a college campus in the fall...nothing like it!

 

I have a feeling that my only professor recommendation is not that great. I took some classes from him and admitted I was in love with English and should have been a major. Then as I started looking for a Masters program, the Ph.D concept came knocking and I literally got swept off my feet. I applied to ONE school...only one. Coincidentally, my writing does now (and always has) kicked ***. Everyone said I should do somethign w/ it (I once was a news anchor/reporter in radio). So it could be that I'm on the line, dangling, due to the fact they see good writing skills. Or that could mean nothing to them and they could just be lazy in sending out rejections.

 

Now that I'm thinking out loud, I remember two high school classmates I saw at the reunion. One applied to medical school and never got accepted. He became a high school Chem teacher and is happy. THe other gal DID get accepted, spent a year in the program, and dropped out. Not for her. She now does stat type work for clients and creates reports and she just bought a beautiful condo in Chicago. I guess the moral of this story is that if it doesn't work out then something else is meant to be. But what???

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Although cridamour is giving good advice, and it is advice that is often given, I feel somewhat different. Instead of saying that "if you're not really 100% convinced that this is what you want to do, it might be better not to do it at all," I would say if you are not really 100% sure that a particular phd program will be sufficient to meet your needs for the next year (and each additional year, but you could always drop out), you should not attend, as the program will take so much of your time so as to not allow for any other activities to meet your needs (social, economic, personal growth, etc). That said, even if your drop out, a year in academia can give you a few new friends, an idea about some nice coffeeshops, access to an extra job listing source and alumni network (maybe), etc. so the investment does not leave you empty-handed even if you do not finish. But that is just me.
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I agree Tripax. I think I might go if they offer an M.A.

 

Does anyone know anyone working happily, full time, as an instructor at a community college with an M.A.? (Teaching at a community college was my first teaching gig ever...even before high school). I've been researching it and it looks quite nice.

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:D

 

After waiting, considering, and pondering, I have decided that even if I am accepted, a Ph.D. is not for me. At this point I am probably rejected, but that's OK because I was thinking about it during this waiting time. As a Humanities person, I did my research and discovered that a doctorate wasn't really in my heart. I also uncovered findings that said most post-docs make very little money, compared to what they are expected to do.

 

The irony is that I was going to study language and new media (such as discussion boards!) But, it was this discussion board that made me realize that you are far more dedicated than I am. I think my one professor tried to tell me that.

 

In terms of my career, however, I do not want to focus on research but rather writing (education and technical). I may someday teach in the community college and I will go for a second masters degree along with a grad certification. But no Ph.D.

 

I admire your tenacity and intelligence. I certainly hope that an acceptace letter fanned the burning desire of the highest advanced degree in your soul. It actually makes me feel good, knowing there are so many wonderfully innovative and intelligent people who will be leading the way through research and development; all while not being paid nearly what they are worth! That's OK. I know how that feels because I am a teacher.

 

My hat is off to you. [clap] Contratulations on your admits and thanks for the insight you gave me on this board. This is a great resource and I'm glad it's here. Good Luck!!! :grad:

 

~Lori

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