please comment..exam is knocking the door

[grad2009]

Hospital statistics regarding people who go to the emergency room after roller-skating accidents indicate the need for more protective equipment. Within this group of people, 75 percent of those who had accidents in streets or parking lots were not wearing any protective clothing(helmets, knee pads, etc.) or any light reflecting material(clip-on lights, glow-in-the-dark wrist pads, etc.).Clearly, these statistics indicate that by investing in high-quality protective gear and reflective equipment, roller skaters will greatly reduce their risk of being severely injured in an accident,




The speaker asserted that the sole cause of roller-skating accidents in streets or parking lots is for not using or apathy for using protective clothing like helmets, knee pads etc. Moreover, this assumption is made from a hospital statistics, which indicates 75 percent of accidents happen only for not using protective clothing, but, it does not tell us the details of this statistical analysis and hence, it is not realistic enough to sustain the speaker's judgment. Finally, the speaker has blindly proposed to invest in high quality protective gear and reflective equipments to reduce the severe injury in accidents. On the basis of the above I will elaborate the flaws in the argument in the following discussion.

Though, using protective instrument during skating is necessary, yet, not using it is not the only reason for the accident. Accident may happen for several other reasons like reckless skating, not following traffic rules and sometimes may be it is not at all the fault of the skater, it is some high speeding vehicles caused the curse. So, this is one of the main flaws of this argument.

However, the speaker’s opinion could be substantiated by proper statistics, which has accounted handsome number of accidental events, in different cities in all over the world or covers a large area and then, by analyzing those data, it could be inferred that the cause of 75 percent accidents are only because of not using protective instruments. It is not clear from the argument that how this statistical analysis has been done, the speaker, might have collected a very few incidents in a small area and on the basis of that miniscule information taking the decision.

Finally, the speaker suggested for the investment of high quality protective equipment as a solution to reduce the number of accidents; nonetheless, after investing in protective instruments, it is not guaranteed that the accidents will reduce significantly because of the vague statistics provided herewith. One might find that the percentage of accidents are not at all decreased, rather increased after investing high amount behind those protective devices.
To conclude, I must vote for the use of protective equipments to reduce the accidents of roller skater but could not be able to suggest for an investment for only buying protective guard and reflecting device, rather will collect some realistic data and after analyzing those information take the final decision whether to invest for a particular devices or to impose some exemplary punishment for violating traffic rules or whatever relevant..

[ashiquebd]

good language and grammer.

but need to better the development and connections.

[samarfadl]

hi grad2009

your argument is good and your analysis has covered all the points in this argu.

it is some high speeding vehicles caused the curse

which has accounted handsome number of accidental events,

i think that your vocabulary in these sentences "curse and handsome" is not in right place.

in general your writing is good and nice.

hope that helps grad2009