Plese Rate .... GRE very soon !!

[Mystery Man]

Topic

The following appeared in a memo from the economic minister of the small country Paucia.

"Using a newly developed variety of seed, farmers in our neighboring country Abundia produced 80 percent more rice last year than in any previous year. To increase the income of farmers in our own country, we should encourage them to cultivate this new variety of rice rather than some of their traditional crops. Such high yields of rice will also improve our country's balance of trade by enabling us to begin exporting it."


Essay

The author has cited an extract from a memo regarding the increase in the growth of the rice crops in the neighbouring country of Abdunia. The author has failed in his attempts to justify his/her claim as the stated argument lacks substance. The author has made many fallacies in his/her claims.

The major fault in the authors claim is that he has not included any data regarding the increase which is stated to be of 80 percent. The presence of data regarding the crops grown in previous years would have bolstered the argument highly. In the lack of proper statistical data regarding the crops grown in the previous year in the neighboring country weakens the argument.

Having stated the reason for increase to be a new kind of rice seed the author has failed to take into account the other possible reasons for the decline in the crops produced in the previous year. The possibility of a famine due to lack of rains or a flood causing the ruin of crops in the previous year can be serious contenders for the stated 80 percent increase in crop production. An explicit statement refuting such sort of claims would have strengthened the authors state.

Another major thing to be considered here is that the increse in the crops production has taken place in a neighbouring country. The physical and the climatic conditions of the two countries may vary considerably even if they are neighbours. As we know that presence of physical features like mountains or uncultivable land due to different soil types can be an obstacle in the use of the newer high crop producing seeds.

Furthur more the author has stated that the use of the newer seeds will bring about an increse in the exports but he/she has failes to consider the fact that this will bring down the productions of other crops and to meet their demands their import would be necessiated. Thus the earnings from the exports would largely be spent on importing other commodities which would have otherwise been grown on home soil.

Because of the above stated reasons the authors claim is proven to be weak. The claim of author is the result of some extremely hasty generalizations where the author has assumed various things and has not taken all factors into consideration. If the above stated fallacies in the claim are removed then it would make it much more acceptable.


410 words
written with 4-5 minutes to spare

Please rate and let me know my errors
Also advice ways to improve.

[yogesh_dahitule]

its nice one and felicitously cited.
IMO it should score upto 5 and not more than it because
u need to change a format a little .
just try to use the words like
although,however firstly,and like that
a spelling mistake single one increse, here is innoccuous to u
but in exam such mistakes are virulent
concentrate over that.
and give some suggestion so as to make it clearly understood
and use the line of parallel reasoning
best luck!!!!

[Mystery Man]

Thanks for pointing that out !!!

Well are the number of words good enough. Are there any word limits for both issue and argument ??

Thanks for the suggestions. I'll keep them in mind.

[Annie9]

essay is coherent , there is no restriction in word limit. Also little minor flaws like spelling mistake, syntax error are usually overlooked and you arent penalised for tht. But, if you have time to spare correcting them will be a better option.
BTW, when is your GRE?
Good luck!

[Mystery Man]

Its on 4th oct and the verbal section is getting on my nerves.

Annie you havent given your views on the essay.
Also take a view at this issue.

http://www.urch.com/forums/gre-analy...ease-rate.html (Please Rate !!!)

Anyways best of luck to you too.