i read thy argument and it is really very good
u have covered all points in thy essay.
nice work ruchia!
see u soon
A folk remedy* for insomnia, the scent in lavender flowers, has now been proved effective. In a recent study, 30 volunteers with chronic insomnia slept each night for three weeks on lavender-scented pillows in a controlled room where their sleep was monitored. During the first week, volunteers continued to take their usual sleeping medication. They slept soundly but wakened feeling tired. During the second week, the volunteers discontinued their medication. As a result, they slept less soundly than the previous week and felt even more tired. During the third week, the volunteers slept longer and more soundly than in the previous two weeks. This shows that over a short period of time lavender cures insomnia.
A folk remedy is usually a plant-based form of treatment common to traditional forms of medicine, ones that developed before the advent of modern medical services and technology.
Citing that since 30 patients suffering from insomnia were able to take a sound sleep on lavender scented pillow the author claims that lavender has the capability to cure insomnia. The argument based on very slight evidence and takes some assumption in its conclusion; thus it stands unconvincing.
Firstly, author does not provide any information over the control group in the study - the group of people that undergoes the study without actually being treated with the drug/therapy being studied in the study. The control group helps to understand whether the symptoms after administering the drug/therapy were common to everybody or only to the group being administered with the drug/therapy. Perhaps the control group could have also reacted in a similar fashion as the other group. Hence, the conclusion would have been rendered false.
Secondly, author assumes that 30 people represent the whole group of people suffering from insomnia. It does not provide any information on their age, gender, occupation etc. to justify that they include a diverse group and all severity levels of insomnia. Perhaps, the people studied were suffering from brief insomnia. Therefore, it needs to be verified if lavender will have a similar effect in other severity levels as well. Hence the author needs to provide some characteristics of the people studied.
Thirdly, the author does not provide any information on how often was lavender refreshed on the pillows. Perhaps lavender evaporated from the pillows and hence did not have any effect on the people studied. Also, this would provide us information about how much lavender was required to cure insomnia. Also, the author does not provide any information over the side effects of lavender. Perhaps, people felt nauseated in the morning.
To conclude, the author needs to support the argument with some information to strengthen it. The argument needs to include information on the control group, the severity level of insomnia in people who participated in the study, whether the study included people with diverse characteristics and last but not least how much lavender was used in the study and whether it had any side effects on the people. This information would strengthen the argument and make it more convincing.
I found couple of points that I felt could be considered for the argument. Please do let me know if you are not convinced with them as I am a beginner.
1. The Author has not mentioned that the Lavender Flowers were taken from which geographical location. Perhaps, the Lavender flowers of different geographical location like south africa or india or america might have different effects. Apparently he has also not mentioned that whether the flowers were from 1 such location or were a mixture from different locations.
2. The author has mentioned that the experiments were done in a controlled room. 1 important point here is whether the results that were witnessed would replicate themselves when the circumstances are diurnal, and we cannot expect ' controlled' circumstances.
3. the author somehow conculdes that Lavender cures insomnia, which means that even if the patient discontinues his/her exposure to lavender, the patient would be relived and wont experience symptoms of insomnia, This point has not been either justified or detailed in the subject argument.
apart from that there is 1 more point, the concentration/ppm of the scent is not mentioned which makes it difficult to say whether it really had an effect in the experiment or not.
A trifle suggestion : You have mentioned somewhere in your essay, that the results can be suspected saying whether the same effect might be witnessed with people with sever insomnia, here I would like to point out that in the subject statement author has mentioned the word 'chronic'.
point no. 2 - yes the user should mention what were the specifications of a controlled room... whether they would be necessary to replicated for the results to show... (sorry initially i did not get this one.... but yes it is a good one!!!!)
point no. 3... I already said... it is good point...
u r doing really good... when is thy exam...?
@Ruchia.. Nice essay buddy. But I am not the write one who can judge you as I have just started preparing for it.
Also, people I have added my essay as well, and would appreciate if you all can give me some feedback on it. This is my first AWA Argument writeup.
The study says that the scent in lavender flowers cures insomnia. The finding indeed can be useful in treating insomnia, but taking it as a complete, quick and permanent remedy for curing insomnia can be an incorrect notion.
First of all, the study involved a set of mere 30 volunteers who were monitored to lead to the final conclusion. It is possible that if the same research is carried out with a larger set of people, the finding may differ from the former one.
Secondly, the three weeks period cannot be ascertained as appropriate and ideal for such a finding. This study if done for a longer period of time can give us different results.
Thirdly, the controlled conditions as mentioned can also be a vital factor behind the results. It is possible that the conditions and surroundings in which the subjects slept may had some effects which helped them to have a sound sleep in the later weeks.
Also, as the medicine was discontinued in the second week which resulted in less sound sleep, we cannot directly gauge it's reaction time period. It can range from a short time of few hours to few days. So, it can likely be also a driving factor behind the sound sleep in the third week.
Therefore, considering these points we can say that lavender leaves can be useful in curing insomnia, but it will be better if we revise our study into a more comprehensive one with a larger number of subjects and try to find out all possible reasons behind the effectiveness of this reasearch and its findings.
Thanks for looking.
There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)