GRE tomorrow! passionate ideas: e-rater gave 4.0 (how to improve?)

[Daniel Sadoc]

Topic:

"The best ideas arise from a passionate interest in commonplace things."

 

Present your perspective on the issue below, using relevant reasons and/or examples to support your views.

 

 

Your Answer:

 

Modern society places a key role on ideas. Therefore, nowadays a very complex and debated topic concerns the process of creation and development of good ideas, also know as creativity. Some people think that the best ideas arise from a passionate interest in commonplace things, while others argue that good ideas are generated when people think out of the box about things that are not related to common issues. Let us analyze each of these perspectives in details.

 

Consider, for instance, the well known biologist Mayanard Smith. In the last century, he made a breakthrough in the Biology literature, proposing a new mathematical model in order to understand the conflicts of interest among species. The model that he proposed is able to capture when and why does the cooperation emerge among birds and mamals. When asked about the source of his ideas, Smith replied that he usually talked with the animals that he was trying to analyze. He of course had a very solid background in mathematics and biology. However, the passionate interest that he had for his object of study permitted him to establish a new landmark in his field.

 

In general, people who make important contributions have a very strong interest in the subject that they are dealing with. Nevertheless, subjects such as physics and mathematics sometimes require a passionate interest in things that are not commonplace. For example, consider the studies about the Big Bang. The best theories about how the universe was created are very abstract. However, even in these cases it is possible to derive analogies with common things in order to explain or develop the concepts. After all, there is no work that is completly uncorrelated to commonplace things.

 

 

Indeed, generally best ideas arise when people are able to see commonplace things through a new perspective. As another example, Charles Darwin developed the abstract theory about the evolution of the species based on passionate observations that he made about the animals around him. Clearly, he wasn't able to reproduce the process throught which species evolve, which lingers for millions of years. Nevertheless, observing commonplace things he figured out an abstract and broad theory in order to explain the reality.

 

 

To sum up, the creative process is very complex since it involves knowledge and emotion. In essence, a passionate interest in commonplace things is generally the motivation that guides managers, scientists and researchers to develop new ideas. In fact, the capacity of dealing with common things through an uncommon perspective is one of the most important capacities developed by creative people.

[Derrex]

Topic:

"The best ideas arise from a passionate interest in commonplace things."

 

Present your perspective on the issue below, using relevant reasons and/or examples to support your views.

 

 

Your Answer:

 

Modern society places a key role on ideas. Therefore, nowadays a very complex and debated topic concerns the process of creation and development of good ideas, also know as creativity. Some people think that the best ideas arise from a passionate interest in commonplace things, while others argue that good ideas are generated when people think out of the box about things that are not related to common issues. Let us analyze each of these perspectives in details.

You have to present your views. You can't take a stand by saying "Let us analyze each of these perspectives in detail". Try to be more assertive like saying "I agree" or "I disagree", or "I agree in certain cases such as.... while I disagree in other cases". Then try to figure out a fundemental reason why the statement applies differently to different cases.

 

Consider, for instance, the well known biologist Mayanard Smith. In the last century, he made a breakthrough in the Biology literature, proposing a new mathematical model in order to understand the conflicts of interest among species. The model that he proposed is able to capture when and why does the cooperation emerge among birds and mamals. When asked about the source of his ideas, Smith replied that he usually talked with the animals that he was trying to analyze. He of course had a very solid background in mathematics and biology. However, the passionate interest that he had for his object of study permitted him to establish a new landmark in his field.

A good example, but you leave out the part about commonplace. You allude to it with the statement "talked with the animals" but try to state explicitly how viewing animals, a commonplace thing, lead him to formulte such a mathematical model.

 

 

In general, people who make important contributions have a very strong interest in the subject that they are dealing with. Nevertheless, subjects such as physics and mathematics sometimes require a passionate interest in things that are not commonplace. For example, consider the studies about the Big Bang. The best theories about how the universe was created are very abstract. However, even in these cases it is possible to derive analogies with common things in order to explain or develop the concepts. After all, there is no work that is completly uncorrelated to commonplace things.

I would be a little skeptical about your example. Are any theories about how the universe was created that are not abstract? Also, your first two sentences could use a little revision. First sentence say "People who make contributions have a strong passion" Second says "Nevertheless, subjects such as physics and mathematics require passionate interest in things that are not commonplace". The never the less sort of implies a contrast, like your pointing out exceptions to the general, yet there isn't really a contrast between "Passionate => contribution" and "Passionate in uncommon => contribution". To make your last sentence stronger, in which you say "No work is completely uncorrelated(bad word choice, should use unrelated) to commonplace things", state an example such as how the Big Bang theory which you provided relates to commonplace things.

 

 

Indeed, generally best ideas arise when people are able to see commonplace things through a new perspective. As another example, Charles Darwin developed the abstract theory about the evolution of the species based on passionate observations that he made about the animals around him. Clearly, he wasn't able to reproduce the process throught which species evolve, which lingers for millions of years. Nevertheless, observing commonplace things he figured out an abstract and broad theory in order to explain the reality.

This is probably your best example and paragraph. Charles Darwin interpreted everyday observances into a theory of evolution. A well reasoned argument FOR the assertion.

 

 

To sum up, the creative process is very complex since it involves knowledge and emotion. In essence, a passionate interest in commonplace things is generally the motivation that guides managers, scientists and researchers to develop new ideas. In fact, the capacity of dealing with common things through an uncommon perspective is one of the most important capacities developed by creative people.

 

 

Sorry for being critical. The main weakness of your essay is that you fail to take a strong position one way or the other or even in between.

The last sentence in your first paragraph really sets it on a bad course and thus, your whole essay suffers from an overall lack of cohesion. Be affirmative on your views and you will do better.

[Daniel Sadoc]

Thank you very much! :tup: