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Thread: 103 The study of history has value only to the extent that i

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    103 The study of history has value only to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives.
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    help me!
    This's my first issue, please give me your valuable comments! thanks!


    History, the carrier of the affairs that have taken place before, is the most valuable heritage passed down from one generation to another. Investigating a road map of the human behaviors, the study of history shows that where we were from, where now we are, and the way, which we should choose, to the future. Hence,not only the history which is relevant to our daily lives, but also the one which is beyond the day-to-day activities of human beings are valuable.

    It is worthywhile to study the history beyond the daily lives ,such as the history related to earth and environment. The lost continent-Atlantis which was described in Plato's famous work sunkened before 12,000 years ago - is the 'Holy land ' for many historians. Obviously,it is unconcerned with our daily lives. The study of it, however, can help us to find out the orginal of the civilization and the interaction between human activities and the environment. Unfolding the image that thousands and millians of inhabitants on Atlantis ran helter-skelter confronting the deluge, historians admonish contemporary to protect the environment and not to recommit to the same errors.

    Furthermore, if we simply deem that only the study of history, which is relevant to our daily lives, is valuable, it would result in stagnation of history. Supposing that the former historians merely cared about the history relevant to their lives, but neglected the one that is beyond their daily lives , nevertheless, valuable to the future-which is exactly our present, our historians would suffer the shortage of historical materials. Because there are enumorous differences between past and present. We can find that many materials are relevant to our procedenssecor's lives but few relate to ours. Finally ,there would have no history and no human in the world .

    The focus on the study of the history ,in fact , is the treatment of the environment and the earth as a whole. The nuclear accidents at Three Mile Island and Chernobyl have been studied to ensure that they do not happen again. Certainly the study of the effects of nuclear materials on humans and the environment provides value beyond the daily lives of people. Moreover, the study of oil spills and their effects on the environment gives similar guidance on how to avoid or at least minimize the damage of an oil spill on the environment. All of these examples of studying history value far beyond its impact on the daily lives of people.

    All the evidences support that the idea of 'study history has value only to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives' is a lopside view. All the history relevant to human is valuable and merit to study.




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    An Urch Guru Pundit Swami Sage
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    Woodbin, here are my comments

    History, the carrier of the affairs that have taken place before, is the most valuable heritage passed down from one generation to another. (Try not to use "is the most", "is the best", etc. Otherwise the reader will be looking for a thorough explanation why that is...) Investigating a road map of the human behaviors ("a roadmap"? are there many roadmaps?), the study of history shows that explains where we were came from, where now we are now, and the which way, which we should choose, toin the future. Hence,_not only the history which is relevant to our daily lives is important, but also the one whichthat is beyond the day-to-day activities of human beings are valuable.

    You used "hence" in an introductory paragraph. That leads the reader to conclude that you already presented enough support to your position, which is not the case.




    It is worthywhile to study the history beyond theour daily lives,such as the history related to earth and environment. The lost continent-Atlantis which was described in Plato's famous work and sunkened before 12,000 years ago - is the 'Holy land' for many historians. Obviously,it is unconcerned withto our daily lives. The study of it, however, can help us to find out the original of the civilization and the interaction between human activities and the environment. Unfolding the image that thousands and milliaons (don't need to use two qualitative adjectives, either use thousands, millions, or several. You should just enumerate them if you connect them with "even" ... thousands or even millions... however it is not appropriate in this case) of inhabitants onf Atlantis ran helter-skelter confronting the deluge, historians admonish contemporary people to protect the environment and not to recommit to the same errors.

    It is a good example. You provided a sound argument of not commiting the same mistake again based on past facts that are not directly related to our daily lives.

    Furthermore, if we simply deem that only the study of history, which is relevant to our daily lives, is valuable, it would result in the stagnation of history. Supposing that the former historians merely cared about the history relevant to their lives, but neglected the one that is beyond their daily lives (kinda repetitive), nevertheless, valuable to the future-which is exactly our present, our historians would suffer thea shortage of historical materials (a bit too long. you might consider breaking it down to two sentences. Also I think you're a little overconfident on this statement... one might argue that there are endless amount of history relevant to our daily lives available out there...). Because there are enumorous differences between past and present (??? a sentence started with "because" and no following?). We can find that many materials are relevant to our procedenssecor's (predecessor?) lives but few relate to ours (again, too confident... it's very arguable!). Finally,there would have no history and no human in the world. (I think it is too drastic... You meant that I wouldn't exist if historians paid attention only to history relevant to our lives? )

    Contrary to the first paragraph, this one does not convince the reader. It is quite speculative with no reasonable foundation behind it.

    The focus on the study of the history,in fact, is the treatment of the environment and the earth as a whole (I believe it is much more... people's behavior, civilization, etc.). The nuclear accidents at Three Mile Island and Chernobyl have been studied to ensure that they do not happen again. Certainly the study of the effects of nuclear materials on humans and the environment provides value beyond the daily lives of ordinary people. Moreover, the study of oil spills and their effects on the environment gives similar guidance on how to avoid or at least minimize the damage of an oil spill on the environment (repetitive). All of these examples of studying history value far beyond its impact on the daily lives of people.

    It is definitely a good paragraph. However, it conveys the exact same idea as the first one! You should be careful while doing that. You could've combined them both with your three or four examples together and that would have been a great paragraph. You must provide a slightly different idea on each paragraph. A slightly different point of view, contrary or favorable.

    All the evidences support that the idea of 'study history has value only to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives' (don't quote like that. GRE evaluators don't like that) is a lopsided view. All the history relevant to human is valuable and merit to study.


    Ops... I could strongly bet that you were against the issue statement. However, the way you finished your essay (last sentence) is a bit confusing. Make sure you ALWAYS post a rebuttal after such thoughts to make sure of your position.

    I believe the essay is well structured. However, the second and third body paragraphs are not at a 5 to 6 score level. For that, you must present different examples... not just different examples, but examples that convey different meanings! Moreover, you should try not being so drastic on your statements. Try to ponder a little more and be more neutral or qualitative on any arguable issues.

    For your first essay, it is not bad at all!! IMHO, I believe you might get between 3-4 on this one... maybe a 4.5 depending on the readers' mood. Your vocab is enough for a 5 and up (considering removing repetitive words), however, you must careful plan before start writing the essay... you missed some examples and ideas to pass on to the reader.

    Good luck!

    personal statement: actually, my essays are not that differrent from yours... I can correct better than actually compose! I'm not a quick guy (to make it excellent in 45 minutes) since I'd rather think through it carefully...


    [/quote]

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    Hi ,wood.
    Thanks for your hard work.
    My first essay is so bad.
    Lack of examples is my biggest problem.
    I find it's difficult to support my view from several aspects.
    And time is limited.
    Do you want to practice each topic of the pool before test?

    thanks again~!
    woodbin

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    An Urch Guru Pundit Swami Sage
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    Hi woodbin.... I wish I could... I actually started going through the issues and arguments and writing 3, four lines as my "plan"... so that if I find the issue/argument on the D day, at least I know what should I write in my paragraphs. That's the best way (I think) to have coverage, while practicing one of the crucial parts of any essay: the initial planning.

    My D day is September 2.... I still need to get muuuuuch better in verbal... the essays are not that hard for me.

    When's your day? Good luck!

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    hi ,wood
    My day is Sept.4.
    I'm not good at sentence arrangement.
    45 minutes are tooooooo short to me.

    I can hardly finish the essay on time.

    woodbin

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    The author say that the value of the history is for the use in the daily life,this point of view has some biases for the purpose of the history research.

    The most of people carry the history research for the purpose of the use in their daily life,the history knowledge can tell them some good experience and the good example in their daily life.For the military general,they must read many different kinds of the history books that tell them the good war strategy in the history,then they can use the good ways to win in the battle.For one country,the leader in that country should read many kinds of the books too,to find the other successful country's experience in the making of their nation.The purpose of the history research should contribute to them,and it is valued from it.

    Secondly,sometimes we do not know some history research's value immediately,and many people just want to have some findings from the past,they are very interested in the history.This interest is very important in the history research.Maybe you will have some great findings,and provide very good value to the daily life.Many historian do their research is because they have the interest to the past things,they have not think too much about the value which their researchs can contribute to,it is this interest and the great will to find the fact in the old time will make some great discoveries,these findings proved to be very valued to the country or daily life later.

    To sum,for the sake of the good history research,and the good guildence for the social development,the broad brain in considering the history is very critical.The history research's purpose is not just for the people's daily use,it is the interest for this world in the past time,and the resposibility to expose the fact in the history river.Its purpose is for the total development of the society,more demoncratic,the right for the knowledge.The value for the daily life is just part of its function.

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    103 The study of history has value only to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives



    The author suggests that we study history for only one purpose that is it is relevant to our daily lives. As per my opinion value of history is not only to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives but also provides innumerable lessons of life and inspiration.

    Archeologists, through their strenuous efforts are always behind one purpose to finding out origin of mankind. For this achievement they have to travel around the world in search of artifacts. Through their researches and studies we are aware of past life of early mankind. Moreover, the living of humankind thousand years back and the standard of our living is incompatible. Studying human history can also help us in understand and appreciate the values and ideals of past culture.

    Additionally, history has not just value to the extent that is relevant to our daily life can be considered through one more example. Revealing through history we can understand the efforts of our brave soldiers who fought for independence of our country. It is because of their sacrifice that we are breathing in democratic country. Studying historic examples of courage in face of adversity can motivate us to face our own personal fears in the life.

    Furthermore, revealing through history is always beneficial because while reading it we can come across some incidents because of which our nation causes great harm. Mistakes in the past can tech us how to avoid repeating such mistakes again in future. For example, in India many years back lot of people died because of plague. It was a total disaster because not proper treatment was available during that time. But through that experience we developed antibiotics in medical science to avert such disastrous disease and its impact. So if in future such situation arises we already have a remedy for saving life of people.

    In sum, it is history that defines who we are! Apart from our daily lives, it is a pathway to make us recognize with many historic things that inspire us to live better life. Admittedly, from history, we can grasp lot many things that will brighten our future.

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    Hello Sonali,

    Here are comments from me. (In Red)

    Originally posted by sonali

    103 The study of history has value only to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives



    The author suggests that we study history for only one purpose that is it is relevant to our daily lives. As per my opinion value of history is not only to the extent that it is relevant to our daily lives but also provides innumerable lessons of life and inspiration. (Cant we say that lessons of life means those are relevant to our daily life? I think we will call lessons of life if something teaches us, which is useful for us in daily life)

    Archeologists, through their strenuous efforts are always behind one purpose to finding out origin of mankind. For this achievement they have to travel around the world in search of artifacts. Through their researches and studies we are aware of past life of early mankind. Moreover, the living of humankind thousand years back and the standard of our living is incompatible. Studying human history can also help us in understand and appreciate the values and ideals of past culture.

    Additionally, history has not just value to the extent that is relevant to our daily life can be considered through one more example. Revealing through history we can understand the efforts of our brave soldiers who fought for independence of our country. It is because of their sacrifice that we are breathing in democratic country. Studying historic examples of courage in face of adversity can motivate us to face our own personal fears in the life.

    Furthermore, revealing through history is always beneficial because while reading it we can come across some incidents because of which our nation causes great harm. Mistakes in the past can tech us how to avoid repeating such mistakes again in future. For example, in India many years back lot of people died because of plague. It was a total disaster because not proper treatment was available during that time. But through that experience we developed antibiotics in medical science to avert such disastrous disease and its impact. So if in future such situation arises we already have a remedy for saving life of people.

    In sum, it is history that defines who we are! Apart from our daily lives, it is a pathway to make us recognize with many historic things that inspire us to live better life. (histrionic things inspire us to live better life. Means indirectly it is useful for us in daily life) Admittedly, from history, we can grasp lot many things that will brighten our future.


    You are saying history not only useful for daily life but gives inspiration and lessons of life. Which I think is one and the same.


    Thanks,
    Tyro

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    thanks tyro,
    i never thought that way!!!!!!!!!!
    Thanks for your comments
    sonali

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