Jump to content
Urch Forums

Please grade my Essay & Argument


googly

Recommended Posts

Hello

I recently gave a practice test where these 2 questions came up. Please grade then & help me improve. Thank you.

"Technology, while apparently aimed to simplify our lives, only makes our lives more complicated."

 

I disagree with the statement that technology makes our lives more complicated rather technology has eased many problems in our lives.

One of the sectors where technology has worked its wonder the most is communication. With the advent of cellular phone we can talk with our loved ones anytime from anywhere. There can be an emergency at home or in the office and we can pick up our phone to make the desired call. Thirty years back my mother was living abroad and she had to wait for a letter every month from home to keep abreast with what is happening at home. Now we use different apps to not only make calls but video calls and can see live pictures. A birth of a baby, a wedding, graduation ceremony or even death of near and dear ones living thousands of miles away can be experienced in our homes. Technology has not only brought families closer but technology is used to make business meetings, job interviews or even interviews with prospective academic supervisors from different countries sitting at our laptops from home. We can even consult with doctors in far away countries using video chats.

 

Internet which is perhaps the greatest invention of the modern times has helped in distribution of knowledge through e-books and journals. Reserachers now -a days can get hold of relevant information at the tip of their fingers. We can also know the latest news and analysis from all around the world the moment it occurs. Revolutionary events such as the Arab Spring used the social media to gather supporters and disseminate information.

Nevertheless technology has its misuses as well. Cyber crimes are commited where private informations are stolen for ransom or other evil purposes. The hacking of yahoo email accounts is a reminder to everyone of how technology can create complications in our lives. Recently a friend of mine had her phone stolen, later she found that her social media and personal email have all been consoliated. She had to go though a lot of trouble to fix the problem.

 

Overall there are drawbacks to technological advancement but the major impact of technology has improved our lives

 

 

 

 

 

 

Argum3ent:

 

SuperCorp recently moved its headquarters to Corporateville. The recent surge in the number of homeowners in Corporateville proves that Corporateville is a superior place to live than Middlesburg, the home of SuperCorp's current headquarters. Moreover, Middlesburg is a predominately urban area and according to an employee survey, SuperCorp has determined that its workers prefer to live in an area that is not urban. Finally, Corporateville has lower taxes than Middlesburg, making it not only a safer place to work but also a cheaper one. Therefore, Supercorp clearly made the best decision.

The argument is flawed due to the following assumptions:

 

The first stated assumption is that because there is a sudden increase in homeowners Corporateville is better than Middleburg. The sudden increase in homeowners could be due to cheaper houses, people buying new homes due to the good condtiiton of the economy or lower interest rates for new house buyers. Any of these factors may contribute to more people buying homes in Corporateville and has nothing to do with Middleburg being a worse place to live.

 

The argument mentions that SuperCorp conducted a survey that found that its employees prefer to live in area that is not urban. The findings of one survey may not reflect the true sentiment of the employees because it is unclear as to how many people were surveyed and what the questions actually were. People give wrong information in surveys and sometimes the reason of the survey determines its findings, such as if SuperCorp had already decided to move its headquarters to a non-urban area it may have designed the survey in a way that would justify the decision.

 

The argument makes the assumption that the new place is a safer place to work without providing any facts to back it up. The increased number of people in Corporateville can cause the price of housing to go up due to higher demand, which will refuting the assumption that Corporateville has lower housing prices.

 

Finally, the assumptions made in the argument can be debated whcih will result in a different conclusion as to whether Supercorp has made the best decision or not.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 7 months later...

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...