I think that I may be having the opposite problem than most who have a partner in grad school. My significant other has been in grad school for three years. She got her masters and is now working on her PhD in psychology. She rarely works more than 25 hours a week on research/writing papers/going to class and meetings. I have a full time job and almost always am working more frequently than her. When I ask her if she could be working more frequently and outing out assignments more frequently she gets very defensive and blames her major professor on her lack of forward progress. Whe talking to her about our future and what is next in her academic career on her path to getting a PhD she seems to know very little and doesn't seems to care about finding out until it is "necessary".

I'm getting frustrated wondering when she will actually graduate (which she projects will take another 3 years). I don't want to be too critical on her because I know grad school is a lot of work. I do try to take a lot stress off her by paying bills, doing laundry, cleaning the house, etc. is 25 hours a week a reasonable amount of time to be spending a week on grad school?