Sponsored Ad:
Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: to build a statue or monument to honor a person

  1. #1
    fei
    fei is offline
    Trying to make mom and pop proud
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    6
    Rep Power
    10


    Good post? Yes | No

    to build a statue or monument to honor a person

    Sponsored Ad:
    Your city has decided to build a statue or monument to honor a famous person in your country. Who would you choose? Use reasons and specific examples to support your choice


    It is really hard to decide who should receive the honor that building a statue or monument to memorize his or her contributions to my country, China. Since numerous people have made great achievements to my motherland, and all of them deserve such honor. However, in my point of view, the one who should be given such honor most is longping Yuan, the inventor of hybrid rice..



    First, it was Yuan that invented a method that guaranteed the rice supply for thirteen million Chinese people. Before Ren working out the new kind of rice, the rice yield of China was insufficient to meet the need of domestic market, and thus China had to rely on the expensive rice imports to make up for the insufficiency. However, thanks to the invention of hybrid rice, situation has changed dramatically. Today, rice yield of China can satisfy most of the domestic market, and can even export some amount of rice to other countries. This great change is due to the effort of Yuan.



    Second, it is Yuan’s dedication to science that deservers the honor. After graduation, Yuan could easily find a high salary job in big cities since, at that time, university students were very limited in China. However, to everyone’s surprise, Yuan chose to work in the poor rural areas and spent the whole life there. When one reporter asked him why he chose to work in the countryside, rather than big cities, he said that because he loved science so much that he would go wherever science need him to go.



    In conclusion, although there are a large number of people deserve the honor. I strongly recommend that Yuan is the most appropriate person for his great invention that solved the food supply of China and his great scientific spirit.



  2. #2
    Eager!
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Vishakapatnam, India
    Posts
    34
    Rep Power
    10


    Good post? Yes | No
    Only two points? any way i found no apparent mistakes, so a 6 or atleast 5.5 is guaranteed
    I swear by my life and my love of it, that i would not live for any one else nor do i expect any one to live for me

    John Galt (in atlas shrugged)

  3. #3
    Eager!
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Vishakapatnam, India
    Posts
    34
    Rep Power
    10


    Good post? Yes | No
    Your city has decided to build a statue or monument to honor a famous person in your country. Who would you choose? Use reasons and specific examples to support your choice.


    Our country, India has a very long and interesting history. The number of people who brought india to its current state are numerous. They are great freedom fighters and politicians and recent business tycoons. Its a difficult choice to choose one of them, but I would choose Ratan SIngh Tata. The reasons for this choice are.

    First every nation which is now at the top economically or politically has its strenght in the industries and technological growth. Tata started first ever steel plant in india in 1890's at that time the plight of the country is awful. India is under the colonial grip of British so there would be no encouragement for any such ventures. Also the country is very poor, constant famines and floods made the lives of common people unbearable. Invensting in such a situation really require great courage and respect of one's decision.

    He is the pioneer of the industrial revolution in india. Till then all the skill of people is indegenous and people build nothing more than cottages. He started his venture and made others follow his lead. The countries present econamcal status owes much to its industires and he is person who started them.

    Also Tata is not greedy, his working principle respect the consumer and the society to which you are servicing. The companies high stance even after more than a 100 years is their adherence to his ethical principles. Tata group of industries expanded and dominates almost all the sectors in india. For every thing his basic vision and understanding is responsible.

    In summation, Tata deserves the credit of a statue in the city because he is the progentor the industrial revolution. His qualities like vision, social responsibility, honesty and courage not only developed his fortune but along with him it developed the whole country's economic situation.
    I swear by my life and my love of it, that i would not live for any one else nor do i expect any one to live for me

    John Galt (in atlas shrugged)

  4. #4
    Eager!
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    44
    Rep Power
    10


    Good post? Yes | No
    Quote Originally Posted by Satyajit
    Your city has decided to build a statue or monument to honor a famous person in your country. Who would you choose? Use reasons and specific examples to support your choice.


    Our country, India has a very long and interesting history. The number of people who brought india India to its current state are numerous. They are great freedom fighters and politicians and recent business tycoons. Its a difficult choice to choose one of them better? . : It is difficult to choose one of them, but I would choose Ratan SIngh Tata. The reasons for this choice are. (it do not sound good to me if nothing is following for examples who is this Ratan Singh Tata? when and where is he born)

    First every nation which is now at the top economically or politically has its strenght in the industries and technological growth. Tata started first the ((ever)) steel plant in india in 1890's at that time the plight of the country is awful. India is under the colonial grip of British so there would be no encouragement for any such ventures. Also the country is very poor, constant famines and floods made the lives of common people unbearable. Invensting in such a situation really require great courage and respect of one's decision.nice argument

    He is the pioneer of the industrial revolution in india. Till then all the skill of people is indegenous and people build nothing more than cottages. He started his venture and made others follow his lead. The countries present econamcal status owes much to its industires and he( is) was the person who started them.

    Also Tata is not greedy, his working principle respect the consumer and the society to which you are servicing. The companies high stance even after more than a 100 years is their adherence to his ethical principles. Tata group of industries expanded and dominates almost all the sectors in india. For every thing his basic vision and understanding is responsible.

    In summation, Tata deserves the credit of a statue in the city because he is the progentor of the industrial revolution. His qualities like vision, social responsibility, honesty and courage not only developed his fortune but along with him it developed the whole country's economic situation.
    nice summation 5.5 ?

  5. #5
    Eager!
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Vishakapatnam, India
    Posts
    34
    Rep Power
    10


    Good post? Yes | No
    Gee thanks.........Ratan is one of the great... but definetly not THE GREAT. But when i started thinking, i got the thought, and i took up the challenge. I dont think one checks for your correctness but for your persuasion. If your good at that you can make an ant an elephant. This is true not only for teofl argument but many other places.
    I swear by my life and my love of it, that i would not live for any one else nor do i expect any one to live for me

    John Galt (in atlas shrugged)

  6. #6
    TOEFL : GRE :: Dimas's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Some where
    Posts
    735
    Rep Power
    12


    Good post? Yes | No
    It is really hard to decide who should receive the honor that building a statue or monument to memorize commemorate his or her contributions to my country, China. Since numerous people have made great achievements to my motherland, and all of them deserve such honor. However, in my point of view, the one who should be given such honor most is longping Yuan, the inventor of hybrid rice..
    (neat)


    First, it was Yuan that who invented a the method that guaranteed secured the rice supply for thirteen million Chinese people delete. Before Ren's working out of the new kind of rice, the rice yield of China was insufficient to meet the need of the domestic market, and thus China had to rely on the expensive rice imports to make up for the insufficiency. However, thanks to the invention of hybrid rice, situation has changed ever since dramatically. Today, the rice yield of China can satisfy most of the domestic market, and can even generate exports some amount of rice delete to other countries. This great change is due to the effort of Yuan.




    Second, it is Yuan’s dedication to science that deservers earned him the honor. After graduation, Yuan could easily find a high salary high-salary job in big cities since, at that time, university students were very limited in China. However, to everyone’s surprise, Yuan chose to work in the poor rural areas and spent the his whole life there. When one reporter asked him why he chose to work in the countryside, rather than big cities, he said that because he loved science so much that delete he would go wherever science need him to go.



    In conclusion, although there are a large number of people deserve deserving this the honor, I strongly recommend that Yuan is the most appropriate person for his great invention that solved the food supply of China and his great scientific spirit


    5.5

  7. #7
    Eager!
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Posts
    58
    Rep Power
    10


    Good post? Yes | No
    This is for Satyajit :

    First[,] every nation which is now at the top economically or politically[,] has its strenght [strength]in the industries and technological growth. Tata started [the] first ever steel plant in india[I] in 1890's[,] at that[a] time[when] the plight of the country is[was] awful. India is[was] under the colonial grip of British so there would be no encouragement for any such ventures[due to which there was no encouragement for such ventures]. Also[,] the country is[was] very poor,[use and instead of the comma] constant famines and floods made the lives of common people unbearable. Invensting[Investing] in such a situation really require[d] great courage and respect of one's decision.

    [revise fragment : Under such circumstances, investing a huge sum of money really required courage and a strong belief in oneself]



    He is[was] the pioneer of the industrial revolution in india[I]. Till then all the skill of people is indegenous[indigenous] and people build[built] nothing more than cottages. He started his venture and made others follow his lead. The countries present econamcal[economic]status[revise to : The countries present economy] owes much to its industires and he is[the] person who started them.



    Also Tata is[was] not greedy, his working principle respect the consumer and the society to which you are servicing. The companies[company’s] high stance even after more than a 100 years is their adherence to his ethical principles. Tata group of industries expanded and dominates almost all the sectors in india[I]. For every thing his basic vision and understanding is responsible. [His basic vision and understanding is responsible for all this.]



    In summation, Tata deserves the credit of a statue in the city because he is[was] the progentor[progenitor] the industrial revolution. His qualities like vision, social responsibility, honesty and courage not only [helped] developed his fortune[,] but[also] along with him it[eliminate italicized words] developed[use improved instead of developed] the whole country's economic situation.
    Don't get bogged down by the number of mistakes. Pay attention to your grammar. Your ideas were good, much better than what I would have written for the topic, but your grammatical and mechanical errors will seriously pull your score down. Occasional errors are pardonable, but a large number of errors pull a score down.

    I would give it a 4 max. If it wasn't for the errors, I would give it a 5.5 for your ideas.

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. Replies: 10
    Last Post: 05-07-2013, 08:42 PM
  2. Replies: 13
    Last Post: 11-16-2010, 05:45 PM
  3. Topic176: Holidays honor people or events
    By akshaykhunteta in forum TOEFL
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 08-11-2010, 01:15 PM
  4. Replies: 7
    Last Post: 06-24-2010, 07:22 AM
  5. Replies: 1
    Last Post: 06-04-2008, 06:32 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

SEO by vBSEO ©2010, Crawlability, Inc.