Not bad, personally, I would give it a 3 out of 4. You display a good faculty of english. You use sophisticated words you've provided good details to support your answer. However, there are a couple of mistakes in your work. You tend to be redundant in your ideas, such as mentioning the value of convenience twice and consecutively.
"Technology is beneficial because it makes people’s lives more convenient and improves human’s abilities. Technology provides people with a lot of conveniences"
Some words were misspelled or misused. Diversified should have been Diverse, belie should be belief. But those are minor mistakes, I think you did a pretty good job!