Sponsored Ad:
Results 1 to 6 of 6

Thread: Analysis of an issue

  1. #1
    Trying to make mom and pop proud
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Posts
    21
    Rep Power
    16


    Good post? Yes | No

    Analysis of an issue

    Sponsored Ad:
    Some one plz grade this essay!!!
    "The rise of multinational corporations is leading to global homogeneity. People everywhere are beginning to want the same products and services , and regional difference are rapidly disappearing”
    The issue of whether “The rise of multinational corporations is leading to global homogeneity. People everywhere are beginning to want the same products and services , and regional difference are rapidly disappearing” is a controversial one .On the one hand I feel that multinational corporations are not leading to global homogeneity, but on the other hand , there is no doubt that the products been offered by giant corporations are to some extent similar. However in the final analysis I believe that, in spite of the similar products being offered by the multinationals, it is ultimately the demand of a consumer that varies from place to place, and is the prime factor for the regional differences, thus maintaining the regional disparity.

    One reason for my belief is that demand for the products offered by the multinational corporations , to a large extent comes from the metros, or cosmopolitan locations,{which contribute to a small fraction of the entire country…. And also the whole world },people from the other part of the country prefer to purchase their own conventional products , with only a handful of modern products.

    Another reason for my belief is that regional differences is primarily based on factors such as geographical, political, and financial differences, and secondly on individual buying pattern, likes / dislikes, tastes , preferences, purchasing power,etc …. And this disparity will not disappear in spite of the claimed homogenous products manufactured by Multinational corporations.

    Perhaps the best reason for my belief is that homogeneity of products will be encouraged only when there is a homogenous/ similar demand all across the globe. And such a demand is likely to arise only when all the economies of the world are at par, till such time ,there would be varied differences in the products and services offered, thus main ting global disparity

    Even if, to certain extent the author’s claim may be true, ultimately, MNC’s have the physical, financial, and human resources at their disposal to invest in R&D to ensure ,that regional disparity in terms of products is maintained.

    For all these reasons , I therefore believe that inspite of the rise in MNC’s there is no global homogeneity .regional differences are maintained.




  2. #2
    Trying to make mom and pop proud
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Posts
    21
    Rep Power
    16


    Good post? Yes | No

    Re: Analysis of an issue

    It would be gr8 if someone can grade or critique this issue .
    Thanks in advance

  3. #3
    Within my grasp! fighter's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    190
    Rep Power
    16


    Good post? Yes | No

    Re: Analysis of an issue

    I really liked your issue writing gmat girl. The consistency , the flow of thoughts is good. I could have esily rated it between 4-5.
    But please keep following things in point.
    Your first para gave a very good idea as in what your thoughts would lead to. While narrating the problem focus on the key idead in ur words instead of cutting and pasting the word to word from the topic. What you can do is just mention it. If you are tensed and no resort , I mean unable to think of short and sweet words then go for the way you have done( to put the topic word to word in inverted commas").

    I really liked your essay. You can mention one or two examples in support of your thoughts. For eg: when you mentioned about rural and urban disparity. You tried to focus on regional disparity being maintained, companies doing research and development. So I would sugg quote ex : In India All MNC's right from NESTLE to CADBURYS are trying to sell their prtoducts by offering especial packaging. We get shampoo saches , noodles -small packets.

  4. #4
    Eager!
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Posts
    92
    Rep Power
    16


    Good post? Yes | No

    Re: Analysis of an issue

    gmatgirl, I think ur overall structire was fine. Lacked some examples, and the first paragraph u did not indicate ur position clearly. You mentioned abt demand and regional disparity. I think it wd have been better if you had stated that the rise of MNCs is not leading to homogenity. Another think i noticed is that you are including discussions more abt the future than at the present - probably better to talk abt the present and then make it lead to the future. The last but one paragraph does not seem to need to stand on its own paragraph.

    I'm still learning too, so let me know if I might have overlooked something in my analysis. Thanks!

  5. #5
    Trying to make mom and pop proud
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Posts
    21
    Rep Power
    16


    Good post? Yes | No

    Re: Analysis of an issue

    Thanks a lot Fighter and GmatguyIL!!! for ur suggesions and ratings.... it has really helped me a lot.
    cheers

  6. #6
    Trying to make mom and pop proud
    Join Date
    May 2011
    Posts
    2
    Rep Power
    10


    Good post? Yes | No
    Gmat girl,

    However, I am very new to the gmat world but would suggest you to break the long sentences into the smaller one. For an example, your first paragraph is full of commas(,) which is not wrong in itself but why to create unncessary redundancy and give an impression of rapping up the whole paragraph in just two long sentences.
    Another thing you need is to support your critique with examples though they need not to be long but should make sense to overall critique. Especially looking at the third para where your have mentioned very strong reasons like geographical, political and financial differences lacks the support of examples. It could have been well supported with the example and you would have provided a strong critique in this paragraph.

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. Analysis of an issue or an arguement??
    By ananthz99 in forum GMAT
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 06-19-2008, 09:35 AM
  2. Please critique my first analysis of issue
    By v-rap in forum GMAT AWA: Analysis of an Issue
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 11-06-2007, 05:00 AM
  3. Examples in Analysis of Issue
    By bads123 in forum GMAT AWA: Analysis of an Issue
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 09-30-2007, 04:25 PM
  4. Analysis of Issue
    By iknownoone in forum GMAT AWA
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 04-23-2006, 12:18 AM
  5. Analysis of an issue first
    By haneen97 in forum GMAT AWA: Analysis of an Issue
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 12-27-2004, 01:03 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •