GRE this weekend and I'd love feedback on this Argument Essay!

[bcfarmer6]

The arguments made to prove Corporateville is a superior place to live compared to Middlesburg are flawed and void of substantial proof. When a company headquarters changes location, there are different factors considered than when an individual or a family makes the same move.

 

 

The truth that there has been a recent surge in the number of homeowners in Corporateville does not prove that it is a superior place to live compared to Middlesburg. There can be many reasons for this surge outside of the fact that SuperCorp recently moved its headquarters to Corporateville. There is the possibility that a myriad of other companies have also moved to Corporateville, not only SuperCorp. Also, just becuase a company moves headquarters does not mean the employees must move with the company. Some employees may have a lease that they cannot afford to break, or have wonderful neighbors they do not want to leave. Corporatesville may have recently installed a large amusement park that people want to live near. The assumtion that employees must move where their job headquarters is located cannot be justified.

 

 

The survey data showing that SuperCorp employees prefer to live in an area that is not urban means nothing with respect to the recent surge in the number of homeworners in Corporateville. Corporateville cannot be the only non-urban city in a commutable distance from SuperCorps headquarters. In addition, the survey data may not even be an accurate representation of all the employees at SuperCorps. The survey may have targeted people with families or people within a certain age or race demographic. There is no proof that the survey was unbiased and/or all inclusive of every employee at SuperCorps and therefore, cannot be an accurate representation of the company.

 

 

While it is understandable for a company to make a move to a new town due to tax cuts and a safer environment, there are different factors to be considered when singles, couples, and families make the same transition. For example, not every employee is in a finacially stable enough situation to be able to move with the company. In addition to financial stability, other employees may have other commitments to Middlesburg such as a spouses current job or the school their child attends. Moving from one town to the next requires more thought and reasoning besides a tax cut.

 

 

The arguements in favor of Corporateville as a superior place to spend life and time have no true meaning. There are many more factors to consider when an individual, and especially a family, makes a move from one town to another. These factors were not considered and therefore, the argument was weak and couldn't provide all the proof needed to make the claim that Corporateville is a better place to live.