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Hi everybody I suppose, this is one of the last essays which I ask your comments about .Because, I am taking Toefl tomorrow. So, please do me a favour and write your advises. The topic: Do you agree or disagree with the following statement?The most important aspect of a job is the money a peron earns. Use spesific reasons and examples to support your opinion. My essay: The salary of a job has a really important effect on people who want to take this job. However, it is not the most important aspect of a job. In my opinion, people you work with and your sentiments towards the job are at least as important aspects of a job as the salary is. In todays modern world, people' s life is divided to two part; the work life and the private life. Meanwhile, every worker spends approximately eight hours of a day in his work with his co-workers. If he does not get on well with his colleagues, he may not be happy with his worklife. As an example, a friend of mine started to work in a company with a good salary two years ago. Some of the company' s stuff looked down him because the school he graduated was not as prestigious as their schools. this behaveiour make my friend very stressful and he left the company. Now he is working in another company where people are more agreeable. His present salary is not as much as the former one but he prefer to work here due to his colleagues. Behind the people you work with, whether you like your job or not is also as important as the money you earn. In my opinion, our goal in our life should be making ourselves satisfied and happy. If your work is not satisfactory, it does not important how much your salary is. For instance I have read in a magazine about a young man who always want to be a gardener. He comes from a wealthy family and his father, a famous lawyer, wants his son to take after him, so sends him to Oxford to study law. The young man goes to the university but leaves it without waiting a term and becomes a gardener. Because, he knows that if he becomes a lawyer he never feels as satisfied as he feels as a gardener. To sum up, money is not the only aspect of a job. Your acquaintances with your colleaques and your feelings towards the job are also very important aspects. However people always put the money forward while they are choosing their jobs. Thanks a lot for reading it. Rumeysa

Thanks alot Atnoon I am really very happy to see my errors are decreasing.However,I hope the real sorers have not as good eyes as you have. I am sending another essay and requesting you to look at it.

Thanks Vaya Your advises help me a lot.

Thanks a lot, Vaya,your comments make me so happy. I am going to take the test tomorrow and I hope the real essay scorers will be as good as you, while reading my essay. P/S:Do not worry about my writing 'i' instead of I because I will write my essay on paper-based type.

Hi everyone I am sending this essay and hoping to read your advises and scores. Frankly, the only think I want to know whether I can take 4,5 (the score i need in the toefl essay) or not. Please, write your comments. this is my topic: no:50 Some people like to do only what they already do well.Other people prefer to try new things and take risks.Which do you prefer?Use spesific reasons and examples to support your choice. My essay is: If you only perform on the areas where you are already successful, your life become an easy and monotonous one. But searching your abilities on other areas, you can make your life more exciting , more advantageously and even more healthy. In this essay, Iwill write about the necessity of trying new things and taking risks. The first reason why trying new things is a necessity is it makes your life more exciting. Doing same routins everday causes an undesirable effect on our character.It makes people start to find the world more boring than they used to do and feel depressed. A person in this character can be neither a valuable employee nor a loved acquaintance. Due to this danger, authorities advise every worker to change their job once in every five years to be always as enthusiastic and as lively as they were in the first day of their work life. Trying new things and taking risks is a necessity not only to support your enthusiasm, but also to use all chances the life gives you. While you are settled in your present safe life style ,you can never discover some valuable opportunities waiting for you in any part of the world. You should search for them so that you are not sorry in the furure. For example, if the first european settlers of America had have stayed in their own countries instead of sailing to the risky new world, they would have never had such a beautiful new country. The last reason of why we should try new thinks and take risks is about our health. If you do what you already have been doing and do not try to improve your knowledge or experience, your health will damage because of your life style. Doctors state that having little stress in life is so much needed for a healthy body. Meanwhile trying new things and taking little risk will be a good source of stress for everyone. To sum up, people like to live in their usual style and to be safe from bad suprisses of the life. However, In my opinion, people should not hesitate to try new experiences and to take risks if they want an exciting and healthy life with a lot of opportunities. Thanks for reading my essay.

Hi! I hope , Antoon will find this essay a pretty little much better than my former one. topic no :026( i suppose) It has recently been announced that a a new movie theater may be built in your neighborhood. Do you support or oppose this plan? Why? Use spesific reasons and details to support your answer. My essay: Movie theaters are important entertainment places for every community. If a movie theater were built in my neighborhood, it would be a very suitable decision because of these reasons I write below. Firstly, all kind of theaters and cinemas are welcomed by my community because of the lack of the entertainment facilities in our neighborhood. I am living in a very distant suburb of a large city and there is not any place to go out in the evenings except a few restaurant here. A movie theater in my neighborhood is really needed for all kind of people. For people who have cars, if there is a movie theater near their home they do not need to drive to movie theaters in the city center. For people who do not have cars, they may easily walk to the theater if it is built in their neighborhood. Beside the inhabitants of my neighborhood, a movie theater built here would also be good for their relatives who are visiting them. Especially, the quests who stay longer than a few nights, may like to go to the movie theater in the evenings. For instance, when I first moved to this neighborhood, one of my cousins came and stayed with me for two weeks. She was living in a city and was used to go out in the evening. She had nothing to do for many evenigs, while she was staying with me, because I did not have a car to take her to the city center frequently. If there had been a movie theater near my home at that moment, she might have had a better visit. To sum up, I would eagerly support their plan, if someone decided to build a movie center in my neighborhood. Because, I believe it would be a very good entertainment facility for both the present community of this neighborhood and their long staying quests. Thanks for reading it.

Hi,antoon Thanks a lot for your message.It will help me to improve my writing skills.

Hi,Vaya I am writing to give you my cogratulations. I hope you will take the score you want. I believe your essay is also a very good one. Best Wishes Rumeysa

hi,flash I think your essay is a very good one that i would not give it less than 5.0. I read it tree times but did not find any gramatical error. However, if i were you, i would use 'should' instead of 'must'in the second and the thirth sentences of the second paraghraph of your essay. Lastly if you use 'have to'instead of 'must'in the fourth sentence of the same paraghraph, i think it would be better. Anyway,i hope you will accomplish your goal.

hi, Vaya Thanks for your advice and pardon for troubling you with not implementing the rules about sending an essay here. Once i had read all three sticky topics at the beginning of this forum but i did not read them again before sending this essay. I hope, my error will be forgiven by you. I am also really sorry for sending the same essay three time to this topic. But this is the first time i have been sending an essay here and when i did not see my essay soon after writing it, i thought that i could not send it. I edit my essay : Though i am at the age of using a car legally, i am drastically frightened to drive one, so i use public transportation, expecially buses, on my everyday life. However the avarage number of people who drive to work are a few times more than that of people who use public transportation in my city. This stuation caused a huge traffic on roads in rush hours. Traffic caused a lot of bad effects like air pollution, noise on the whole city and the fact that while drivers in their cars, they spend hours of their life waiting. Because of the gases the cars engines spread to air, people inhaling this air pick up serious illness like lung cancer. The noise traffic creates is also very harmful to the populations health surpassing peoples ears. Some people think that building new roads and highways, the government might emerge traffic with all its harmful effects. In my opinion building new roads may solve the present problem but it does not work against the growing population and their new cars. After a few decade the new highways and roads will not be enough to support hundreds of thousands of new cars. The main solution is improving the public transportation and encouraging people to use buses trains and subways instead of using their personal cars. In the city i live in the most common public transportation vehicles are buses. However they are not enough to transpot all eleven million city population. Other public transportation vehicles like trains and subway, serving in just a little part of the town, are not efficient on the daily travel of the people. Thanks for reading my essay,

hi,everyone please ,write your comments about my essay because i need them. my essay: Though i am at the age of using a car legally,i am drastically frightened to drive one, so i use public transportation,expecially buses, on my everyday life.However the avarage number of people who drive to work are a few times more than those of people who use public transportation in my city. This stuation caused a huge traffic on roads in rush hours.Traffic caused a lot of bad effects lke air pollution, noise on the whole cityand while drivers who are waiting in their cars also spend hours of their life waiting.Because of the gases the cars engines spread to air, people inhaling this air pick up serious illness like lung cancer.The noise traffic creates is also very harmful to the populations health surpassing peoples ears. some people think that building new roads and highways the government might emerge traffic with all its harmful effects.In my opinion building new roads may solve the present problem but it does not work againstthe growing population and their new cars.After a few decade the new highways and roads will not be enough to support hundreds of thousands of new cars. the main solution is improving the public transportation and encouraging people to use buses trains and subways instead of using their personal cars.In the city ý live in the most common public transportation is buses. However they are not enough to transpot all eleven million city population.Other public transportation vehicles like trains and subway travelling in just a little part of the town are not efficient to the daily travel of the people. thanks for reading it

hi,everyone please ,write your comments about my essay because i need them. my essay: Though i am at the age of using a car legally,i am drastically frightened to drive one, so i use public transportation,expecially buses, on my everyday life.However the avarage number of people who drive to work are a few times more than those of people who use public transportation in my city. This stuation caused a huge traffic on roads in rush hours.Traffic caused a lot of bad effects lke air pollution, noise on the whole cityand while drivers who are waiting in their cars also spend hours of their life waiting.Because of the gases the cars engines spread to air, people inhaling this air pick up serious illness like lung cancer.The noise traffic creates is also very harmful to the populations health surpassing peoples ears. some people think that building new roads and highways the government might emerge traffic with all its harmful effects.In my opinion building new roads may solve the present problem but it does not work againstthe growing population and their new cars.After a few decade the new highways and roads will not be enough to support hundreds of thousands of new cars. the main solution is improving the public transportation and encouraging people to use buses trains and subways instead of using their personal cars.In the city ý live in the most common public transportation is buses. However they are not enough to transpot all eleven million city population.Other public transportation vehicles like trains and subway travelling in just a little part of the town are not efficient to the daily travel of the people. thanks for reading it.

hi,everyone please ,write your comments about my essay because i need them. my essay: Though i am at the age of using a car legally,i am drastically frightened to drive one, so i use public transportation,expecially buses, on my everyday life.However the avarage number of people who drive to work are a few times more than those of people who use public transportation in my city. This stuation caused a huge traffic on roads in rush hours.Traffic caused a lot of bad effects lke air pollution, noise on the whole cityand while drivers who are waiting in their cars also spend hours of their life waiting.Because of the gases the cars engines spread to air, people inhaling this air pick up serious illness like lung cancer.The noise traffic creates is also very harmful to the populations health surpassing peoples ears. some people think that building new roads and highways the government might emerge traffic with all its harmful effects.In my opinion building new roads may solve the present problem but it does not work againstthe growing population and their new cars.After a few decade the new highways and roads will not be enough to support hundreds of thousands of new cars. the main solution is improving the public transportation and encouraging people to use buses trains and subways instead of using their personal cars.In the city ý live in the most common public transportation is buses. However they are not enough to transpot all eleven million city population.Other public transportation vehicles like trains and subway travelling in just a little part of the town are not efficient to the daily travel of the people. thanks for reading it.

first of all thanks alot to you for your replies.all of it help me to cope with my score. i have to take the test again untill the middle of this month.so i should study very very hard to accomplish it this time. lastly,while i was preparing the test before the structure practice section of this site became very helpful but i have scarcely looked at the writing section,unfortunately.

first of all thanks a lot for all your replies. i have estimated that i should take the test again in the following two weeks because the university should receive my score before the last day of the following november. while i was preparing for the former toefl test ,the structure section of this site was very helpful to me.unfortunately i scarcely looked at the writing section.this time i wont do the same mistake.