I have written the below issue for GRE awa practice.I know it is very bad but please give me points of improvement and also how much can i expect in gre with this kind of essay.
Thanks in advance.
Issue topic:As people rely more and more on technology to solve problems, the ability of humans to think for themselves will surely deteriorate.
Technology is an integral part of our lives today. The growing technology has produced some great wonders, which we never imagined were possible a few years ago. It is the human who has developed technology, so I do not agree that technology hinders human thinking ability.
The world population is growing at an exponential rate. In order to meet the needs of so many people it is necessary that we become efficient and productive with the limited resources we have. It is technology which has enabled us to be highly efficient in terms of food and shelter. The area of land which could produce 100kg of rice is now capable of producing 10 times more with the help of modern technology. The modern day technology is not only supporting us but also helping us survive.
Imagine if we did not have cars, trains or airplanes. How would you travel long distances? You would be confined to a small area. Today we can roam around the world and see places which ancestors never knew even existed. The transport and communication has enabled us to do business on a global level. Our best technology creation, computer has worked wonders for us. Complex calculation, saving information as well as making this information available with just a click is just amazing. It is the humans who have created this new technology to save our lives from dreadful diseases. We try to make our lives as easy as possible and today technology has made this possible in every way.
There are two sides to every coin. Technology also has disadvantages. Today the children start using calculators at an early age in school .Even simple calculations which were earlier done manually are now being done on calculators. This hinders the development of the brain. We refrain from walking even short distances which has adverse effects on our health. But these things can be avoided by taking some precautionary steps.
Thus, I would conclude by saying that we do rely on technology today but, it does not hamper our thinking ability.