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vvaann

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vvaann last won the day on June 29 2005

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  1. It's still downloadable under the link: http://www.megaupload.com/?d=207RF7WK (wait 45 seconds after clicking)
  2. It's always nice to have essays reviewed by ish. Very detailed and helpful analysis.:tup: Okay, I see! Yeah, we found the solution :) Alright! I think this is very nice. Sure. I does help very much. Thanks a lot! Okay, now I gotta prepare for a job interview tomorrow. Wish me luck!
  3. :) One more thing here: Should we remove the preposition 'about'?
  4. toeflmania, I can see you have been writing many essays lately and working really hard. Congratulations! Your writing reached a near-perfect state:) . Regarding this essay, you didn't make any serious mistakes - only some minor ones which are acceptable considering that it was finished within 26 minutes. The test graders will be aware of that. Comments: - Clear essay, strong grammar - The first body para was somehow irrelevant. - Nothing else to comment!:) Grade: 5.5 or 6.0 Something for your Friday test: You can practice hard and you can work intensely, but don't forget that your physical and mental conditions on the day of the test are decisive. Have the Thursday off. Think positive. Yes! Think positive from today on. Clear up all negative thoughts. Whatever will be going on on Friday, always think positive. Good luck,
  5. ish, Thanks a lot for the suggestions. Let's discuss some of them. What is the problem with 'To me'? How should I edit? If I make it "my", it will be "my favourite room in my home is definitely my private room..". :hmm: It's repetitive and sounds awful. Why should I remove this word? I wanted to stress that the other rooms are common rooms, which are shared by family members. Only my room is not. I can't. Do you have any suggestion on a replacement? I meant the quiteness or the silence of my room. I didn't mean the "acoustics", which are the design or the shape that make it good for carrying sound. Agreed! Agreed! Once again, thanks a lot for your helpful comments. Hope to hear more. Regards,
  6. Both links given above are working: http://s4.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=17JK4X9LRAXB31IEXW8R37GRKI http://www.megaupload.com/?d=207RF7WK As for the second one, after clicking, you have to wait for about 45 seconds and then click on "click here to download" Good luck,
  7. Hi, Some people have written essays on "my important room". I'm producing another one. Here is my room and hope to hear your feedback. Topic: What do you consider to be the most important room in a house? Why is this room more important to you than any other room? Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. To me, the favorite room in my house is definitely my private room, which is separated from other common rooms of the family. While I have dinner in the dining room and watch television in the living room, my most important room is my own one. That room is an ideal place for my concentration and it has become more than a room – a friend. I need a quiet and isolated room where I can concentrate in study and entertainment. I can hardly raise my thinking to a high level of concentration in a noisy and disturbing atmosphere. My room is the only place where I can work or study for the whole day without somebody knocking on the door, which is really annoying to me. I can’t image how I can try to find solutions to a math problem while my little brothers are annoyingly playing around and sister is listening to music. Additionally, the room is also a perfect place for me to play music. I play the guitar and I love the silence of my room that enables the sound of my guitar to evolve purely and beautifully. Last but not least, my private room has become something personally special to me. I have been living in that room for about 15 years or so. I have had many anniversaries with that room. That is where I study all the long nights for exams. That was where I started practicing the guitar until becoming an advanced player – a period of ten years. I clean my room every day. I repair it when something is broken. I paint it every year. I would say I treat it like a friend. I always want to stay in that room rather than any other ones in my house. I don’t have to think much when asked about which my favorite room is. My private room is a place that offers me a small freedom, a place for concentration, and a passionate space. It is a very old room now, but I never want to leave it. One day, I will have to leave for a new and larger room; I will feel sad though.
  8. Comments: - You had good ideas to write about but you had difficulties expressing them clearly - You tend to use some phrases that you're not sure of. Be careful! - The intro and the first body para were good. However, your writing quality degraded towards the end - Keep writing!
  9. Zioyd, Yes, it is worth reading. I think it's a good essay in fact. Comments: - Your grammar is good and you can write clear sentences - The introduction and the first body paragraph are good - The second body paragraph is not really about why it's the most important room. You'd better take another approach - You seemed to run out of time when writing the conclusion. You can make it better Grade: 5.0 Good luck and keep writing! p/s: As you complained this topic is difficult, I'm also trying to write one essay about it and gonna post it.
  10. vvaann

    A question

    have proven to be mistakes is fine. Prove can be used as a linking verb (the likes of smell, taste, feel, etc.), e.g. That object proves [to be] dangerous The error in this question is they were being tricked. The whole phrase should be simply replaced by 'tricks' to make it in parallel with 'mistakes' and 'misconceptions'. Regards,
  11. I'd prefer 'has been coexisting'.
  12. cridamour, I don't mean to suspect your recommendation, but more than 80% of the reviewers at Amazon rate this book badly. It might mean something. http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0399144463/qid=1122591784/sr=8-2/ref=pd_bbs_sbs_2/102-0391985-5978531?v=glance&s=books&n=507846
  13. Comments: - Pay attention to the essay structure. You need to have an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each body para has a point and it is supported by examples or arguments. I'd recommend that you have 3 body paras to the maximum. Each para should be separated by an emty line. - Pay attention to punctuation. Grades: 4.0 - 5.0 Keep writing and you will improve much. Regards,
  14. Okay. Here it is: http://s4.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=17JK4X9LRAXB31IEXW8R37GRKI
  15. Does anybody have a recommendation on self-motivation books? I'm re-reading the "Think and grow rich" by Napoleon Hill. The author, considered one of the best of his kind, talked about the power of our mind, or the will power, that is capable of converting our dreams into reality. The book are full of live examples supporting the writer's philosophy. Regarding English, this book is easy to read. More references can be found here: http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0449214923/qid=1122516135/sr=1-1/ref=sr_1_1/102-0391985-5978531?v=glance&s=books You can find a free copy (ebook) in the internet. I can send you one if you're tired of searching.
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