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Please guide me and give feedback on my response to the below mentioned argument essay. I need help to understand where i stand and how much improvement is required to get a good score in essays. Topic :- In surveys Mason city residents rank water sports(swimming, boating and fishing) among their favourite recreational activities. The Mason river flowing through the city is rarely used for the pursuits, however, and the city park department devotes little of its budget to maintaining riverside recreational activities. For years there have been complaints from residents about the quality of the river's water and the river's smell. In response, the state has recently announced plans to clean up Mason river. Use of the river for water sports is, therefore, sure to increase. The city government should for that reason devote more money in this year's budget to riverside recreational activities. Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on the assumptions and what the implications are if the assumptions prove unwarranted. Response: The author's argument that the city government should devote more money in this year's budget to riverside recreational activity needs more information and thought. In the argument the author draws conclusions based on incomplete and vague assumptions. The Author diverts from the actual solution and fails to understand why the demand and craze for water sports have decreased among the residents. The author states that the favorite recreational activities of the residents of mason city is "rarely" to be seen now. This is because the Mason river flowing through the city is maintained. The river is no longer fit to be used for water sporting events because it is dirty. The author says that "little" of the budget is used for it. The term "little" is a vague assumption made by the author and it is not a fair implication of the conclusion. As the river maintenance might not require a lot of money or any more than it has been assigned. It might only require a dedicated team that works on the maintenance of the river. The author concludes that more money should be devoted towards the riverside recreational activities. But according to the assumptions made here, the implication here should have been that more money from the budget should be devoted to the maintenance of the river which in turn promotes riverside recreational activities. The argument could be better concluded by specifying more accurate numbers in case of assumptions on the budget for river maintenance. The author should concentrate on the maintenance of the river instead of promotion of recreational activities. I believe that the author fails to understand the demand and supply needs here as the demand of the water sports will increase only if the supply of clean water is provided.

The arguments made to prove Corporateville is a superior place to live compared to Middlesburg are flawed and void of substantial proof. When a company headquarters changes location, there are different factors considered than when an individual or a family makes the same move. The truth that there has been a recent surge in the number of homeowners in Corporateville does not prove that it is a superior place to live compared to Middlesburg. There can be many reasons for this surge outside of the fact that SuperCorp recently moved its headquarters to Corporateville. There is the possibility that a myriad of other companies have also moved to Corporateville, not only SuperCorp. Also, just becuase a company moves headquarters does not mean the employees must move with the company. Some employees may have a lease that they cannot afford to break, or have wonderful neighbors they do not want to leave. Corporatesville may have recently installed a large amusement park that people want to live near. The assumtion that employees must move where their job headquarters is located cannot be justified. The survey data showing that SuperCorp employees prefer to live in an area that is not urban means nothing with respect to the recent surge in the number of homeworners in Corporateville. Corporateville cannot be the only non-urban city in a commutable distance from SuperCorps headquarters. In addition, the survey data may not even be an accurate representation of all the employees at SuperCorps. The survey may have targeted people with families or people within a certain age or race demographic. There is no proof that the survey was unbiased and/or all inclusive of every employee at SuperCorps and therefore, cannot be an accurate representation of the company. While it is understandable for a company to make a move to a new town due to tax cuts and a safer environment, there are different factors to be considered when singles, couples, and families make the same transition. For example, not every employee is in a finacially stable enough situation to be able to move with the company. In addition to financial stability, other employees may have other commitments to Middlesburg such as a spouses current job or the school their child attends. Moving from one town to the next requires more thought and reasoning besides a tax cut. The arguements in favor of Corporateville as a superior place to spend life and time have no true meaning. There are many more factors to consider when an individual, and especially a family, makes a move from one town to another. These factors were not considered and therefore, the argument was weak and couldn't provide all the proof needed to make the claim that Corporateville is a better place to live.

Woven baskets characterized by a particular distinctive pattern have previously been found only in the immediate vicinity of the prehistoric village of Palea and therefore were believed to have been made only by the Palean people. Recently, however, archaeologists discovered such a "Palean" basket in Lithos, an ancient village across the Brim River from Palea. The Brim River is very deep and broad, and so the ancient Paleans could have crossed it only by boat, and no Palean boats have been found. Thus it follows that the so-called Palean baskets were not uniquely Palean. Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument. Given that baskets similar to those found in Palea village had been found in Lithos, it cannot be concluded that the Palean baskets were not distinctive to the village of Palea. The argument that the lack of proof of a boat is rife with holes to suggest that Palean baskets were not unique to the particular village. The argument mentions the Brim river to be broad and deep without giving any details on the climatic conditions that might have been during the prehistoric times. For instance, if the villages of Palea and Lithos had experienced torrid summers that drained the Brim river leaving it completely dry, people could have easily crossed the river without the aid of a boat. Therefore, this instance gives rise to the possibility of exchanging Palean basket with the people of Lithos. Since archaeologists came to the conclusion based on no traces found of a Palean boat, there might have been reasons for the disappearance of the boats. For instance, if the Brim river was much deeper and had stronger currents compared to today, the Paleans boats might have washed away and no traces are left as of today at those sites. Since the villages were pre-historic, there might have been major floods that had washed down any form of evidence that would lead to knowhow about the boat technology that they used. Another key point that weakens the argument is that we still don't have any notion of whether there were any boats made by the villagers in Lithos. The archaeologists have only sought after Palean boats. There is a possibility that the Paleans didn't have the required boat technology that people of Lithos had developed or even mastered. If there were Lithos boats, people might have used it to visit the Palean land and take some of the baskets with them as memories or souvenirs. Thus, a lack of information about the Lithos people fails to give a complete picture of the society and technological development back then. In conclusion, although Palean baskets had been found in the land of Lithos, there shouldn't be a quick jump to a conclusion based on incomplete facts. The archaeologists should work to discover more about the Lithos people and comparing both of them come to an agreement.

Two years ago, radio station WCQP in Rockville decided to increase the number of call-in advice programs that it broadcast; since that time, its share of the radio audience in the Rockville listening area has increased significantly. Given WCQP's recent success with call-in advice programming, and citing a nationwide survey indicating that many radio listeners are quite interested in such programs, the station manager of KICK in Medway recommends that KICK include more call-in advice programs in an attempt to gain a larger audience share in its listening area. Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation. ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- ----- The objective of the station manager of KICK in Medway is to gain a larger audience share in its listening area and to achieve the same he has decided to adopt the formula of success that worked for WCQP in Rockville. But there are some demographic concerns that he should consider otherwise his decision might not have the impact that he expected and could rather backfire. Firstly, it is not necessary that interests of the audience in Medway are the same as the interests of the audience in Rockville listening area. The station manager at KICK would need to collect more information about the audiences and interests of the Medway listening area itself. Catering to the needs of the customers is always a great business strategy that seldom fails. Therefore, he should determine whether call-in advice programs is really what the listeners of Medway need. He could also go about ascertaining this by understanding what type of programs have worked for KICK (and other radio stations in Medway) in the past. He would then have a better understanding of what type of radio programs to boost on KICK radio station. Another thing that the station manager at KICK needs to determine is the nature of competitors that they have in Medway and the nature of competitors that WCQP had at Rockville. Since the objective is to increase "audience share" in Medway, this would also depend upon the competition they both have in their respective geographies. It is quite possible that the competition at Medway is fierce and KICK is up against wealthy rival radio stations and therefore, he may not see the same proportion of increase that WCQP did at Rockville. The passage also talks of a nationwide survey that indicated many radio listeners were interested in call-in advice programs. Before trusting the conclusions of the survey, it is important to figure out what type of audience was surveyed, how the survey was conducted and whether the surveyed audience is a representative sample of all the radio listeners in the country. If there was any bias involved, it would be better to only focus on the interests of radio listeners in the Medway area and steer their business strategies accordingly. Every business has its own unique selling point on the basis of which they build and maintain a customer base whose interests are aligned with the kind of programs the radio station broadcasts. They create a brand image in the minds of the people on which they tend to maintain the customers. Also, KICK station will have to hire radio jockeys and experts that would be appropriate and have the required skills for hosting call-in advice programs. These are concerns that need to be addressed before trusting the success formula of WCQP. If the strategy fails and KICK build a negative brand image among the Medway audience, it would deal a huge setback to their business. In conclusion, the station manager at KICK should not trust the recipe of WCQP and the results of national survey. He should consider the demands of their existing customers, interests of the new customers they wish to acquire, the labour costs and their own business plans and branding before going ahead with this strategy.

Dear Friends and GRE Experts, I am preparing for GRE and this is my 5th attempt to write a GRE essay (different topics each time). This is an argument topic given on official GRE website. I would request you to have a look on the essay and grade it upon convenience and availability of time. Thank You. Sincerely, NickyGRE. Actual GRE Argument Prompt: The following appeared on the Mozart School of Music Web site. "The Mozart School of Music should be the first choice for parents considering enrolling their child in music lessons. First of all, the Mozart School welcomes youngsters at all ability and age levels; there is no audition to attend the school. Second, the school offers instruction in nearly all musical instruments as well a wide range of styles and genres from classical to rock. Third, the faculty includes some of the most distinguished musicians in the area. Finally, many Mozart graduates have gone on to become well-known and highly paid professional musicians." Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted. ____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ The argument presented is a form of advertise on the website of Mozart School of Music, which promotes its readers to consider itself as the first choice while thinking of learning music or musical instruments. The first assumption that this kind of arguments suppose is that people would visit the web-site on which the advertisement has been published. It may be a case that the other schools of music publish their advertisement in news paper, other forms of print media or in radio or television broadcast, while the Mozart School of Music may be alone in publishing the advertisement through its web-site and there may be very few people, actually interested in learning music or musical instruments who might visit the web-site and the advertisement displayed in it. Though in the second statement, the argument states that it welcomes people of all age-groups and all ability levels,in the first statement it reveals its unstated assumption that its chief cluster of clients is children by stating 'the first choice for parents'. This suggests that the majority of new customers or new students that this school gets comes from children or youngsters of lower age. This also suggests the scientific assumption that at lower ages, the interests are easier to be cultivated, nurtured and developed than at higher or older ages. The fourth statement argues that the school possesses some of the most distinguished musicians as its faculty members. It is a vague and unclear statement since it doesn't state what are the criteria on which it establishes the 'most distinguished' status of its faculty members, for example, popularity of their musical albums, variations and skilles incorporated in their musical scores, intuitions presented in their compositions - these all factors can make them distinguished and well-reputed. Also, what it assumes as 'the area' is again a debatable topic, as music is a very wide region having majestic scope and its classification can vary individually. One possible classification can qualitatively confine music into different areas like vocal music, instrumental music etc. In the final statement, the argument assumes that the Mozart graduates, who have gathered reputation and fame after getting educated from the school, are well-known to the readers of this advertisement since there are no details given about the individuals who succeeded on the base of education gathered from the Mozart School. Then, again, the argument assumes that the relative term 'highly paid' communicates unanimous and unambiguous meaning to all different classes of its readers- poors and rich people alike. In conclusion, the argument poses some seriously flawed assumptions which can be corrected. Above is response typed in actual test conditions: 431 words