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Thread: #158: The 20th century saw great change

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    Hi all

    Your comments are highly appreciated by sunflower

    [The 20th century saw great change. In your opinion, what is one change that should be remembered about the century. Use the specific reasons and details to explain your choice.][/quote]

    There were many important changes in the 20th century. But that one stood out of the rest was the development of Internet technology. Internet technology has brought to the human being both economic and social benefits. Therefore, Internet is the most important change for me.

    As Internet is a technology that allows individuals computers to connect with each other over the world, information sharing and communicating have become more easier.

    Internet is like a large library from which people can access and exploit lots of information they need. This kind of electronic library consists of many informative web sites in all fields such as society, economy, culture and politics. Internet is a really useful tool for the purpose of teaching and studying.

    Internet is a fast and economical mean of communication. Just by clicking on “Send”, one person can send e-mail to his/her friends who live at a very long distance and his/her friends can instantly receive this mail. Moreover, the development of Internet technology nowadays allows us to organize video conference which means that we do not need a physical meeting, participants may sit at various places in the world while the meeting takes place.

    One more important benefit that Internet has brought to the human is the economic development. There is a new kind of business with the support of Internet, called e-biz. People nowadays can stay at home and go shopping from e-shops. To make payment, they use e-bank’s accounts. Everything is convenient and economical.

    I can’t think of any other change that bring us the convenience and usefulness as much as Internet has done for us. We are thankful for the advance of Internet technology.

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    Life Activist! vertical_horizon's Avatar
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    Hi all,

    Before reading this, you all should know that not all of my comments and corrections are 100% good and correct, cuz I'm a student, too. I just wanna show my own grammar that I've learned, and certainly it's not perfect.

    Only my thoughts...

    Originally posted by sun_flower

    Hi all

    Your comments are highly appreciated by sunflower

    The 20th century saw great change. In your opinion, what is one change that should be remembered about the century. Use the specific reasons and details to explain your choice.
    There were many important changes in the 20th century. But that one stood standing out of the rest was the development of Internet technology. Internet technology has brought to the human beings both economic and social benefits. Therefore, the Internet is the most important change for me.

    As the Internet is a technology that allows individuals computers to connect with each other over the world, information sharing and communicating have become more easier.

    The Internet is like a large library from which people can access and exploit lots of the information they need. This kind of electronic library consists of many informative web sites in all fields such as society, economy, culture and politics. Internet is a really useful tool for the purpose of teaching and studying.

    The Internet is a fast and economical mean of communication. Just by clicking on “Send”, one person can send e-mail to his/her friends who live at a very long distance and his/her friends can instantly receive this mail. Moreover, the development of Internet technology nowadays allows us to organize video conference which means that we do not need a physical meeting, participants may sit at various places in the world while the meeting takes place.

    One more important benefit that the Internet has brought to the human is the economic development. There is a new kind of business with the support of the Internet, called e-biz. People nowadays can stay at home and go shopping from e-shops. To make payment, they use e-bank’s accounts. Everything is convenient and economical.

    I can’t think of any other change that brings us the convenience and usefulness as much as the Internet has done for us. We are thankful for the advance of Internet technology.
    Hi sun_flower!
    I'm happy that you made few mistakes (which are easy for me to see ) this time.
    The only big mistake is that you must use 'the' before 'Internet'.
    And about the pattern 'bring sb sth'='bring sth to sb', I'm sure you know this, don't ya ?

    About your ideas I think they're pretty good, but you wrote

    There were many important changes in the 20th century. But that one stood standing out of the rest was the development of Internet technology. Internet technology has brought to the human beings both economic and social benefits. Therefore, Internet is the most important change for me.
    I can’t think of any other change that brings us the convenience and usefulness as much as the Internet has done for us. We are thankful for the advance of Internet technology.
    The intro & conclu look like those of the essay on the topic 'What is the most important change in the last century', while this one just simply asks you about 'one change that should be remembered about the century'. IMO we needn't find that change the most important.

    Anyway I think you've written such a nice essay !

    300 to ya,

    verhor

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    Within my grasp!
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    Hi Sun flower!!!
    It's a nice essay. You clearly explain your view points.
    Personally, your conclusion and second paragraph are too short and fast end up. Perhaps, the second paragraph need you to add some examples.

    Just my two cents!!!
    At noon

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