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Hello everyone! It would be great if you could just review my essay and provide your valuable feedback. Thanking in advance Please see- If you want me to rate your essay, just post a link to your essay after your review! Topic- Many lives could be saved if inoculations against cow flu were routinely administered to all people in areas were disease is detected. However, since there is a small possibility that a person may die as a result of inoculations, we cannot permit inoculations against cow flu to be routinely administered. Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument. The author in his argument claims that, cow flu is widely spread in some areas. This fatal flu, can be treated by providing inoculatuons against cow flu to the people who are affected by it. But there is a small posibility that if the inoculations itself might result in killing a person. Hence the regular provision of inoculations should not be permitted. While the author is correct in saying that if the inoculations themselves are fatal, they should not be administered routinely; but since the flu itself is fatal and can lead to death of many more people when inoculations are not administered. Without further evidence, the claim is not justified. The evidence required are- 1:- Number of deaths due to inoculations vs number of deaths when inoculations are not administered, 2:- Till how many doses, is the inoculations not fatal, 3:- Is there any other mode of fighting the disease other than inoculation? The first evidence is the most crucial evidence in this argument. It considers the number of deaths when inoculation is administered due to overuse of it and the number of death that take place when they are not administered. In other words, it is comparing the number of people saved by inoculation with the the number of people died due to over adminstration of it. Although the author is his claim explicits mentions that more people are dying when not adminstered, it is helpful to have a more confound statistic of the same. As the number of people dying without it is much more higher then those due to the vaccine, the authors claim is unjustified and hence should not be implemented. The second evidence is regarding the number of doses till which the vaccine is not fatal. All the inoculations are not fatal from the beginning. If there is overuse of it, then it is fatal. Hence it is imperative to know the maximum doses till which it is not fatal. Also how regulalry should the inoculation should be administered should be found. A survey of doctors who are treating the disease and the researchers examinig the virus should be undertaken for this evidence. The third evidence is related to the future of treating the disease. If any new discovery is made which is not fatal and is as good in treating the disease as the current one, trails should begin at the earliest. Thus without these evidence, the authors claim is unwarranted and should not be implemented. The people suffering from the disease should be treated with inoculation till any new discovery is made. The treatment should be such that it is not excessive, but is just enough to fend off the disease.

Hi! First of all, I would like to mention that I am a student taking the GRE so I don't know how accurate my suggestions would be! :(..Also English is not my first language so there's a chance that my suggestions are not that great! Still I'll try Good about the essay- 1- Familiarity with the language 2- Ample of relevant example 3- Structured paragraphs with each para serving their purpose Things that can be improved- 1- What I feel is that the stand that you choose should be mentioned in the first para itself, as the graders grade the essays in minutes( or seconds?).. So clearly stating the stand in the beginning might prove to be a good idea! 2- I really don't like the second person word 'you' that's used in the first para( 2nd line)..maybe change that? 3- In the second para, Galileo is fine and even the modern society's condition is fine. But steve jobs and richard brandson feel a bit out of context? 4- In the fourth para, I don't feel comfortable with the starting..( maybe use Holocaust and whatever the other one is called instead of 'Those'?) I wont give a rating as I really have no idea how to rate..all in all, it was a nice essay with certain improvements that can be made. Help me with reviewing my essay? http://www.www.urch.com/forums/introductions/157751-please-review-rate-essay.html#post1005022

Hello everyone! It would be grreat if you could just review my essay and provide your valuable feedback. Thanking in advance PS- If you want me to rate your essay, just post a link to your essay after your review! Topic- All too often, companies hire outside consultants to suggest ways for the companies to operate more efficiently.If the companies would spend more time listening to their own employees, such consultants would be unnecessary. Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position. Essay Although at the first look, this claim of author looks very much plausible and believable. But on further examination, it might not prove to be true. All the processes require some sort of management to be efficient and successful. Hence all the companies have a basic structure in place. Even the governnments have a postional structure whereby every aspect of governence is covered. If the authors claim is implemented, there's a strong probability that the company will be in chaos as each and every employee will have his/her own view which they deem think should be implemented. This view of employees is infulenced by many factors and is not always beneficial to the company. Hence the authors view is unwarranted and if the claim is approved, there is a possibility of plunging the company into chaos rather than making it more efficient. As the author rightly points out that companies hire outside consultants for increase in efficiency, these consultants dont provide their comments for free and they charge the clients exorbitantly for their services. So if this trend was unjustified, this would dampen the primary goal of a company: i.e increase in profits as this would lead to more operating costs. This trend is a very good indicator of the beneficial insight that such consultants provide in increasing the efficiency of company management. Another indicator of this is the profits of these consultancy firms and the number of their employees. Now considering that the author's claim is justified and a company decides to listen to the employees view and not hire a professional consultant. Majority of the employees in a company dont have a formal training or studies in management. Hence they dont understand various factors involved in a company operation. The views provided by the employees are more concerned with the work culture that surrounds them and the facilities that the company provides to the employees rather than with organization. For eg.- a mechanical engineer in a company will be more interested in the softwares provided to him for designing. Similarly sales guys would be more interested in the reduced targets. Thus the employees are more concerned with what affects them rather than something that they are not even a part of. On the contrary, a professional conslutant will make a detailed study of what is the company organization and how to improve it. Since the professional auditors have a past experience in this field, they are at a better position to assess the company standing. I have personally seen the impact that professional auditors have on a company. The company that I worked in, Waaree Energies, were valued at $250m. This valuation was forlorn when compared to the company potential. They then hired a professional consultant. The consultants studied the company data for past decade and were able to find the reason for this low performance on the company's part. Armed with this data, they suggested ways in which the company could function more efficiently. After applying all the suggestions, the valuation rose by $100m in a single economic year. Having personally witnessed the change that professional consultants bring to a company, I am totally convinced of the idea of outside consultants and would disagree with the authors claim.