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I went through a pretty long process of applying to grad schools, waiting for decisions, deciding between my options, feeling like i wasn't ready for grad school/didn't deserve to go (imposter syndrome, yo), re-sparking my interest, realizing i was capable after all, getting ready to go, and then after all that was over i ended up falling sick. Sick as in something i have been to the hospital for, and not sick as in a prolonged flu. I'm working on managing the illness with my doc but it's a bit unsure now whether i'll be well enough to start school in the fall. In either scenario (being well enough to start or too ill to even attend), i certainly won't be at 100% starting off grad school and now i'm starting to panic about what i should do. On the one hand, I'm reluctant to postpone my program, having to go through applications all over again and feeling like i'll be wasting not only next year by delaying, but also feeling like the entire struggle of this year was for nothing. On the other hand i'm scared of starting when still ill, or when i'm still in the process of recovering (this sort of thing takes a few months to clear up at minimum usually), and then trying the program but having to leave partway through because it makes my illness worse or my illness would obstruct me from being able to do full time work (part time isn't an option for this program). You hear about people falling sick during their grad programs due to stress and other issues, and if i'm starting off ill i can only imagine having it go downhill from there. I'm being advised by the doc to take some time off, but it's not like i can just start in a later semester, i'd have to postpone by a whole year. Has anyone been in a position like this before, where they'll potentially have to delay/cancel grad school before even starting? I don't even know how i'd approach my profs about getting reference letters all over again for reapplying...