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what is the title of your essay? If it is about influenence of TV on childern, it is a good essay even some words are not properly used. I rate is as 4.5 or 5. Good job if it is your first essay.

it is my revised version. topic 131-Only people who earn a lot of money are successful. Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Only people who earn a lot of money are successful. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. When I read this title, I have to admit that it is really a good question. It let me think again and again what the success is. Definitely, I do not totally agree with the statement of title. However, the wealthy people are indeed a successful group. So let me discuss what the success includes, and then to get a conclusion. First is money. There are too many examples to tell, such as Bill Gates, Dell, the mayor of New York and more and more. Nobody doubts their successes. Besides them, there are many wealthy people in the world. Are they successful? My answer is yes if they reach their goal with their endeavor. Money is a sign of their success, a result of their struggle, and fruit of their intelligence and knowledge. However, money is not everything. Some people earn their money but respect from our society. Dirty money gives them wealth, and it also gives them a guilty. Without respect, money means nothing. Second is reputation. many people believe that fame brings money, but it isn't always true. There are many famous people who are not rich. For instance, Vencelt vab gough is one of a successful painters in the world, but he died in poorness. Mahatma Gandhi was the most successful leader in India. His thought influenced many outstanding leaders in the world, such as Martin Luther King, but he didn't have enough money. And more, there are millions of famous scientists who are not rich by today's standard, but they are the well-known successful in our society. However, success may not have above. Money and reputation are not all of it. My friend, Helen, she is from a very poor family. Her parents could bring her enough money for her education, but gave her very strong personality. She was a good student, a good worker, and then a good team leader. Now she is an editor for a newspaper. Is she a successful person? I bet there are not many people knowing her, and she does not earn a lot of money. But she is living in a happiness without worrisome. I think she is successful for her personal goal. Success is everywhere. People who earn their respect and reputation are successful, and people can reach their goal by their endeavor are also successful. Money is a sign of success, but dirty money may lead you to a jail. If the history is a good judge of success, then money isn't everything.

you have argued the good points. I rate it as 5. It is better to make the introduction more elegant and make your examples more vivid. Anyway, it is good essay.

not bad essay even it is overlong. I rate it 5.

Good, I like it even though some words are not proper. But the conclusion seems overlong and not necessary because it only repeats the words in the text. It is better to create some short words to enhance the points which you wrote. Generally, it is a good essay. I rate it as 5.

not bad of introduction. no convincible supporting examples. The statement of the 2 support reasons is not so clearified. On my understand, the first one should be "ads induce our craving of advertized goods." The secondary one should be "ads exaggerate their products and mislead consuming. " But you did not state them clearly. So, Doctor, I rate it no more than 4.

So many grammar mistakes. Some sentences I hardly understand well and there are no convincilble examples. So sorry, I give you no more than 4.

Thanks for your comment. Nowadays, the human population is blooming more and more, which directly confirm that our activities make the earth better and better to live. = The blooming population is a strongle evidence of the fact- human activity makes the earth a better place to live.

29 Some people believe that the Earth is being harmed (damaged) by human activity. Others feel that human activity makes the Earth a better place to live. What is your opinion? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer Some people believe that our earth has been seriously harmed by human activity. They may give us many examples to support their argument, such as air pollution, breaking of ozone layer, globe warming and so on. However, I personally support the opposite voice, which is that human activity makes the Earth a better place to live. It may not need to go too far to find some reasons and examples. Increasing of world population may give us a good reason to say that human activity ameliorates heavily the living condition of the earth. We all know that epidemic and war are main killers of human being in the past. It goes a long, long period for human to make the population bigger and bigger. However, in the past 100 years, human activities a little by little overcome the natural devastation and wars. Nowadays, the human population is blooming more and more, which directly confirm that our activities make the earth better and better to live. Second of all, human activity makes us more and more convenient, not only we have more and variety of food, but also the communication and transportation make us closer and closer. We can do what we can and what we image. However, it is no wonder that human activity has some side effects, such as variety of pollution, environmental change, etc. But I still believe it is sure human being will create some technologies to overwhelm all the shortages in the future. Finally, let me conclude here that human activity does improve our earth and make it better and better to live. And human being will overcome all the shortages created by them own.

right, support points and example do not match the initial view of the author. So I'd rather give no more than 5. But finish the essay in 30 mins is not that easy. You are a good writer though.

not bad at all. good structure, good examples, and every clear points. You should get 5.

I happened to have this topic in my first exam. I got 4 for my essay. I recalled I had same attitude and structure as yours. But it looks that yours is a little better than mine. So I would give you 4.5. I am sure you would not get >5. Now I am still confused how to make high score for this topic. I have not seen a very good essay yet. If you can find one, please let me know, I will appreciate it.

not bad. >4.5

much better than others. I cannot believe you improve yourself so quickly. doing something as it is done.

a little confused about your attitude on liking preparing food in home or going to eat out. If you like eating out, you ought to focus on delicate food, diversity and variety of culture, romantic moment and surrounding, and appreicate time. So this time, I give you 3.5 or 4.