celtic_tiger_econ Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Canuckonomist = HIMYM fan :-) It's my fave show these days. Awesome. True Story. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
celtic_tiger_econ Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Oh, and you guys have it easy in terms of your relationships, I'm really only applying to Grad Schools there in order to be with my gf, we met in Ireland but she can't work here and I can't work there, and its too soon to get married. I wanted to go to Toulouse or the Autonoma (UAB), but que sera sera... After I'm done with grad school, I def wanna go home to Ireland! I am gonna miss family and friends so much... and I realise Grad school is gonna be tough on our relationship - it'll be a lonely first few years for me! Any thoughts? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canuckonomist Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Oh, and you guys have it easy in terms of your relationships, I'm really only applying to Grad Schools there in order to be with my gf, we met in Ireland but she can't work here and I can't work there, and its too soon to get married. I wanted to go to Toulouse or the Autonoma (UAB), but que sera sera... After I'm done with grad school, I def wanna go home to Ireland! I am gonna miss family and friends so much... and I realise Grad school is gonna be tough on our relationship - it'll be a lonely first few years for me! Any thoughts? Hey dude, I'll likely be in your boat, so no, I don't have it easy, and I'll share your pain. Thoughts? What relationship are you talking about being strained? Your relationship with your friends and family, or with your girlfriend? On the latter, my thoughts: Try the long distance thing. If it's really tough, take break from the relationship. There is no use making those few years miserable. I've done the long distance thing before, and it's not so bad when it works. When it doesn't, get out, and perhaps get back together later. It's quite a miraculous thing when you take a break, and then realize that there is nothing better out there than what you had. When you run in opposite directions, it often pulls the knot tighter, you know. I have faith that you can do it, though. You'll need to find life outside of her, which while it may be difficult, is a great asset, because, while it doesn't sound like the most romantic thing to do, your relationship will be stronger for it. Trust me on that part. Speaking of Ireland, the girlfriend and I should be coming there over the summer. If you're around, I'd love to buy you a beer. Please tell me you drink Guinness. Canuck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FilleNouvelle Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Canuckonomist = HIMYM fan :-) It's my fave show these days. Awesome. True Story. In that case, I'd say every PhD guy should just pull out the "Naked Man". Works 2 out of 3 times. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MathMathMath Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Hey dude, I'll likely be in your boat, so no, I don't have it easy, and I'll share your pain. Thoughts? What relationship are you talking about being strained? Your relationship with your friends and family, or with your girlfriend? On the latter, my thoughts: Try the long distance thing. If it's really tough, take break from the relationship. There is no use making those few years miserable. I've done the long distance thing before, and it's not so bad when it works. When it doesn't, get out, and perhaps get back together later. It's quite a miraculous thing when you take a break, and then realize that there is nothing better out there than what you had. When you run in opposite directions, it often pulls the knot tighter, you know. I have faith that you can do it, though. You'll need to find life outside of her, which while it may be difficult, is a great asset, because, while it doesn't sound like the most romantic thing to do, your relationship will be stronger for it. Trust me on that part. Speaking of Ireland, the girlfriend and I should be coming there over the summer. If you're around, I'd love to buy you a beer. Please tell me you drink Guinness. Canuck I think that taking a break (even if you think you might want to get back together) would be difficult on the relationship if both people don't agree to it. If one person wants to stay together and the other insists on taking a break, it would be really hard for the 1st person to get back to the same level of trust if you get back together. I don't see why you'd need to take a break up to appreciate what you have. Some people might already realize that there's nothing better than what they have. Doing long-distance for a 1-year masters is one thing, but if you think you're going to spend the rest of your life w/someone, I think you should do the best you possible can to not separate for 5-6 years if it's at all possible. I feel like long-distance in undergrad is one thing, because you're (in most cases) not at the stage when you're thinking about moving in together (since you're probably living in a dorm) and making financial choices together (since you're probably dependent on parents or loans or scholarships), but depending on how old you are when you enter the PhD program, you might be around 30 or so when you leave, and many people are at the stage where they want to be living together and moving forward w/a significant other by that point in life. Also, since the PhD is 5-6 years, it's not something where you can just "try" being long distance and leave after a year if you don't like it (since transferring would be quite difficult and you probably wouldn't want to abandon your dreams of the PhD). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Peot Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 You know, while you dudes are studying the econ, I would strongly suggest you also spend time learning how to game. Therein lies the beauty of studying economics: we know all about games. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
99luftballoons Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Therein lies the beauty of studying economics: we know all about games. I think that she thinks that you think that I think that she thinks... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chestnut.cc Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 backward induction ftw.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
celtic_tiger_econ Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Hey dude, I'll likely be in your boat, so no, I don't have it easy, and I'll share your pain. Thoughts? What relationship are you talking about being strained? Your relationship with your friends and family, or with your girlfriend? On the latter, my thoughts: Try the long distance thing. If it's really tough, take break from the relationship. There is no use making those few years miserable. I've done the long distance thing before, and it's not so bad when it works. When it doesn't, get out, and perhaps get back together later. It's quite a miraculous thing when you take a break, and then realize that there is nothing better out there than what you had. When you run in opposite directions, it often pulls the knot tighter, you know. I have faith that you can do it, though. You'll need to find life outside of her, which while it may be difficult, is a great asset, because, while it doesn't sound like the most romantic thing to do, your relationship will be stronger for it. Trust me on that part. Speaking of Ireland, the girlfriend and I should be coming there over the summer. If you're around, I'd love to buy you a beer. Please tell me you drink Guinness. Canuck Sorry, wasn't too clear from my post that my gf is American, from NY, willing to move wherever I end up next year... I'm going to Grad school to be in America with her... When I said 'lonely' I meant that because of the workload and the lack of family and friends around, it's gonna be lonely, even if my gf and I are together. You can't have just one person in your life... I will need to make some friends so I hope Grad students in the States aren't quite as competitive as I've heard... My real problem will arise in years to come if/when I want to move home to work in Ireland, if my gf has a decent job (she's an RD) in the States it will be hard to convince her to come with me to Ireland... Canuckonomist, when are you visiting? I'm not gonna be around much of the summer, hoping to move over to the States as soon as possible and get a place to live etc. ;) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annasui Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 I think I know what you mean. I've been dating an artist for quite some time now (about half a decade), and being with someone who has different work-life aspirations is kind of refreshing. Translation: I'm tired. I don't like the pressure of a PhD program. I wished I had a more creative, adventuresome lifestyle. I will live vicariously through someone else who accomplishes the things I wish I was doing but cannot because I will not take the necessary risks to get this done. I saw a play with one of the Demi Moore brat pack ensemble. It was about an artist dating a businessman, and by the end of the play the logical arc carried the artist towards another artist and the businessman back to his wife in Connecticut. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annasui Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Sometimes when i read this forum, geez... Obviously, during the first year, it'll be tough, with the hours and what not. But the way I see it, if you took a job in the private sector (assuming the offer wasn't rescinded), you'd be working the same kind of hours. So really, we aren't in terribly different situations than our job destined friends. You just need to readjust how you meet people. It isn't going to be like undergrad anymore, where largely you met people at parties. Next time you have an assignment to work on, go to a cafe, you'd be surprised how easy it is to meet people. Hell, I've actually had a barista pick me up. And for all of you wondering about placement issues, I guess it is a matter of preference, but for me, I would always choose to cater to my significant other than take the conflicting job offer. That's sweet. Hopefully, I'll be number two on the job offer list. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MathMathMath Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Translation: I'm tired. I don't like the pressure of a PhD program. I wished I had a more creative, adventuresome lifestyle. I will live vicariously through someone else who accomplishes the things I wish I was doing but cannot because I will not take the necessary risks to get this done. I saw a play with one of the Demi Moore brat pack ensemble. It was about an artist dating a businessman, and by the end of the play the logical arc carried the artist towards another artist and the businessman back to his wife in Connecticut. I'm not dating an artist, but there must be benefits to dating someone who would be more likely to be able to follow you around wherever you go, as opposed to someone who is also pursuing an advanced degree and might not get into the same schools as you, or someone who is pursuing the corporate ladder and has to go wherever they get the best job offer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
economics Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Translation: I'm tired. I don't like the pressure of a PhD program. I wished I had a more creative, adventuresome lifestyle. I will live vicariously through someone else who accomplishes the things I wish I was doing but cannot because I will not take the necessary risks to get this done. I saw a play with one of the Demi Moore brat pack ensemble. It was about an artist dating a businessman, and by the end of the play the logical arc carried the artist towards another artist and the businessman back to his wife in Connecticut. hahaha Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canuckonomist Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Translation: I'm tired. I don't like the pressure of a PhD program. I wished I had a more creative, adventuresome lifestyle. I will live vicariously through someone else who accomplishes the things I wish I was doing but cannot because I will not take the necessary risks to get this done. I saw a play with one of the Demi Moore brat pack ensemble. It was about an artist dating a businessman, and by the end of the play the logical arc carried the artist towards another artist and the businessman back to his wife in Connecticut. Funny. I won't feel the need to seriously justify myself all too much, because it's obvious you misread my post, or your translator is broken. If being in a Ph.D program prompts you to think one lacks creativity, I kind of feel sorry for you. But in the chance that you're just playing, good one. Also, for MathMathMath, it doesn't work that way. Just because someone's not in grad school doesn't mean they don't have serious commitments to education. My girlfriend will be attending Art school next year, and it would be luck that we would end up in the same spot together. If we have to spend some time apart, that's fine. She's not going to sacrifice her dreams to live a few extra years with me. Artists, musicians and bards have academic requirements, too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
annasui Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 I'm not dating an artist, but there must be benefits to dating someone who would be more likely to be able to follow you around wherever you go, as opposed to someone who is also pursuing an advanced degree and might not get into the same schools as you, or someone who is pursuing the corporate ladder and has to go wherever they get the best job offer. I have troubles taking a sculptor's or musician's methodologies as seriously as my own, so I'd have communication issues whether they were 10 feet or 1000 miles from me. You can be lonely in a crowd: physical distance means less than communication distance. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canuckonomist Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 I have troubles taking a sculptor's or musician's methodologies as seriously as my own, so I'd have communication issues whether they were 10 feet or 1000 miles from me. You can be lonely in a crowd: physical distance means less than communication distance. That's kind of sad. Musicians are much more mathematical than you'd think. In fact, being more mathematically inclined enhances your musicianship greatly. As suggested before, take a look at Randy Wright. We also have a Ph.D band going here. Perhaps you should pick up an instrument and give it a try? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MorgieLilly Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 I have troubles taking a sculptor's or musician's methodologies as seriously as my own, so I'd have communication issues whether they were 10 feet or 1000 miles from me. You can be lonely in a crowd: physical distance means less than communication distance. I used to be a professional artist before switching to economics and I'm finding my research projects to have a surprisingly similar methodology to my old artistic ones. Creativity, organization, discipline in execution are important in both. I don't think there has been much of a difference in the way I communicate with people either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MathMathMath Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Funny. I won't feel the need to seriously justify myself all too much, because it's obvious you misread my post, or your translator is broken. If being in a Ph.D program prompts you to think one lacks creativity, I kind of feel sorry for you. But in the chance that you're just playing, good one. Also, for MathMathMath, it doesn't work that way. Just because someone's not in grad school doesn't mean they don't have serious commitments to education. My girlfriend will be attending Art school next year, and it would be luck that we would end up in the same spot together. If we have to spend some time apart, that's fine. She's not going to sacrifice her dreams to live a few extra years with me. Artists, musicians and bards have academic requirements, too. You're right, I shouldn't judge. And you've made me realize that I probably shouldn't date an artist, because I would have to learn to take art more seriously. =/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MathMathMath Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 I have troubles taking a sculptor's or musician's methodologies as seriously as my own, so I'd have communication issues whether they were 10 feet or 1000 miles from me. You can be lonely in a crowd: physical distance means less than communication distance. Hm I think ideally it would be best to date something that I'd consider to have a relatively professional career but that has career opportunities available in basically any major city. Maybe an accountant. There are probably needs for accountants in all cities (although I find standard accounting boring). (Of course this is just a hypothetical abstraction of what would be easiest, not something I actually base relationship decisions on.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canuckonomist Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 You're right, I shouldn't judge. And you've made me realize that I probably shouldn't date an artist, because I would have to learn to take art more seriously. =/ I don't think you'd have to take it more seriously than thinking art is not a waste of time. If you think that it is, don't date an artist. :p But any other better appreciation for art will do. My girlfriend knows I'll never be able to critic art properly, and I think she's happier with that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FilleNouvelle Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 I don't think you'd have to take it more seriously than thinking art is not a waste of time. If you think that it is, don't date an artist. :p But any other better appreciation for art will do. My girlfriend knows I'll never be able to critic art properly, and I think she's happier with that. That's one of the cool things about dating a non-economics person. You learn a lot. I know nothing about what my boyfriend studies (don't like it most of the time, to be honest), but whenever I read one of his papers, I learn a lot and am pretty amazed about what he's capable of. I'm pretty sure it goes the other way around too. Plus, I think annasui's suggestion that you should date someone who is a reflection of the person you are (or want to be) is a bit too narcissistic for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MathMathMath Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 I think I'm most compatible w/people in somewhat quantitative fields (but not economics for some diversity) - For example I really like learning about science but I didn't get to fit much science into my schedule in college, or math (math PhD's really impress me), or compsci, or statistics. But then again, sometimes you meet someone who just makes you feel connected and comfortable and happy with them, even if they aren't the specific type you would have thought you'd select. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Canuckonomist Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 I think I'm most compatible w/people in somewhat quantitative fields (but not economics for some diversity) - For example I really like learning about science but I didn't get to fit much science into my schedule in college, or math (math PhD's really impress me), or compsci, or statistics. But then again, sometimes you meet someone who just makes you feel connected and comfortable and happy with them, even if they aren't the specific type you would have thought you'd select. I see where you're coming from on this one, and do agree with it wholeheartedly. Math Ph.Ds are terribly fascinating. My best friend, who is going to be doing her Math Ph.D next year, is terribly fascinating, especially with the work she does. And I like that I can understand (for the most part...) what she's doing. So I can see why you'd find that attractive in a mate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MathMathMath Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 I see where you're coming from on this one, and do agree with it wholeheartedly. Math Ph.Ds are terribly fascinating. My best friend, who is going to be doing her Math Ph.D next year, is terribly fascinating, especially with the work she does. And I like that I can understand (for the most part...) what she's doing. So I can see why you'd find that attractive in a mate. Math research fascinates me enough when I can read through it (or listen to it) and comprehend the general idea and methodology and conclusion, but know that I'd never in a million years have been able to come up with the idea/solution on my own. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
batmanisafatman Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Its kind of silly discussing such personal matters on the internet... not really my style. As if anyone here could provide much insight into your interpersonal dilemmas and needs, and as for relationships... we tend to have much less control over them than we like to think anyways. I will say to Canuckonomist that long distance relationships are TERRIBLE, and should be avoided if possible. :yuck: But then again, I'm not really in a position to actually provide any insight into your personal situation. Personally, I think that Grad-school would be a great opportunity for getting some romance (this may not apply to me :blush: but we'll see how that goes). Not only do we have the experience from our undergraduate lives, but we are smarter and will have more contact with other graduate students and young-professionals (not to mention undergraduate students if you are so inclined). This should lead to more interesting conversations and more developed relationships than previously were had. Also, hopefully everyone on the board knows a little bit more about themselves and what makes them tick, having gained some wisdom with age, and will be better prepared to position themselves in a relationship which works for them. If you meet someone you truly care about, then careers and academia concerns will not matter anyways (at least relatively). In the meantime just remember to have fun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.